


Stay

by augustrain3



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-09
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-05-04 14:24:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14594940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/augustrain3/pseuds/augustrain3
Summary: Alex and Sam both need a friend. What happens when they add in some benefits, and how long until someone starts catching feelings?—Set early Season-3, post-breakup, pre-Reign.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I should be finishing my other work, but I got side tracked.
> 
> I don’t usually do smut, but here goes.

Sam sits at a chair around the coffee table at Kara’s apartment, spinning her empty glass of wine in her fingers. It’s Saturday night. Girls’ night. It’s become somewhat of a regular thing these days, and Sam admits that it’s been nice to have a reliable social event to get her out of the house on a weekend for something other than a soccer game or a karate lesson or a PTA meeting.

Across from her, Kara and Lena are curled up together on the sofa, Lena’s arm draped over Kara’s shoulders, Kara’s hand around Lena’s thigh. They are both beaming.

Alex sits to Sam’s right on the floor, her hand on her own glass of wine. Sam eyes Alex from across the table. Her gaze is on Kara and Lena, gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes. For just a moment, Alex looks sad, forlorn, before she wipes the expression from her face and replaces it with a smile, taking another sip of wine. 

The truth is that she and Alex aren’t close, not like Sam is with her sister. They’ve never spent time together just the two of them, never texted or called, never formed anything outside if these girls’ nights with Lena and Kara, but she’s grown fond of her. Over a short time, she’d found Alex endearing. Quick-witted and big-hearted. Strong-willed, and a touch salty, but at the same time, there is always a warmth that emanates from her that has drawn Sam to her, made Sam crave her presence at these nights at Kara’s.

It’s been nearly three months since Sam had learned from Lena about the dissolution of Alex’s engagement. Sam hadn’t been given details; she hadn’t asked. She knew it must have been irreconcilable though considering the way Alex had always looked at Maggie the few times Sam had borne witness, like Alex’s whole world fit into that tiny frame. It’s the way Sam had always wished someone would look at her. 

But now, Maggie’s absence was palpable in Alex’s demeanor. She’d become quieter, more serious. That easy carefree charm had all but disappeared. 

It was a feeling she recognized, that loneliness, and it only drew Sam to her more.

Across the table, Kara tilts her head up and Leva leans down for a long, deep kiss. 

“Hey, love birds over there,” Alex starts. “I know you’re honeymooning, but any way we can keep the groping to a minimum?” she teases lightheartedly, but Sam can catch the sadness in her eyes. 

“We’re not groping,” Kara insists. 

Lena shrugs. “Maybe a little.”

“We’re not that bad. Sam, is it that bad?” Kara asks, turning to her. 

Sam laughs. “I love you both and I love seeing you so happy, but as part of the single people constituency here tonight, I’m inclined to agree with Alex.” 

Sam’s eyes meets Alex’s.

“See?” Alex says with a self-satisfied smirk that bring a smile to Sam’s face. “But you can continue your grope session, because I’m going to head home,” Alex adds as she swallows the last sip of her wine and stands to her feet.

“Alex,” Kara groans at her sister, but they all know this has become par for the course, Alex dipping out early from social events.

“You know, I think I’m gonna follow Alex’s lead,” Sam says, standing. 

“No, why? Stay,” Kara implores. 

“As surprising as it is, third wheeling is not my favorite way to spend Saturday night,” Sam says with a laugh.

“And home alone is?” Lena counters, doubtfully, flashing her a questioning look that Sam disregards. 

Sam simply smiles. “Goodnight, ladies.”

—

Sam stand beside Alex in the elevator in silence. Alex has her phone out. Sam briefly glances over and sees her pulling up the app to get a ride.

“Need a lift?” Sam offers.

Alex looks up. “Oh, no, thanks.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah... I’m not going home,” Alex replies, looking sheepish. 

“Where you headed?” Sam asks. 

“Out? I was just gonna get a drink,” Alex says with a shrug. 

“Can I join you?”

Alex’s eyes widen in surprise.

“Unless you’re meeting someone,” Sam continues. “I don’t want to impose.”

Alex shakes her head. “Not meeting anyone.”

“So?”

“Sure. If you want,” Alex replies, and by her tone and her expression, Sam knows Alex is confused by the request. 

“Ruby’s at a sleepover, so I don’t usually get a night for myself,” Sam tells her, and even though it’s not the full explanation, it’s partly true. 

“No, it’s fine,” Alex replies, looking guilty for almost objecting. “I was going to try out a new place. It’s um...” Alex shifts her weight awkwardly and averts her eyes as she continues. “It’s called Lipstick. 

Sam nods. “Sounds good.”

“Are you sure?”

“Why wouldn’t I be sure?”

“It’s just... It’s a lesbian bar,” Alex stutters out. 

“I know,” Sam replies nonchalantly. 

“Oh...”

Sam sees Alex’s brows furrow in confusion, and it takes all her self-restraint not to smirk. 

“I’ll get the Lyft,” Sam says instead. 

—

It’s dimly lit and flooded with women, as per usual, Sam thinks. She looks over and sees Alex’s eyes taking in the space, absorbing it for the first time. 

“I always thought they should have called it Chapstick,” Sam comments. “I mean, how many women in here are actually wearing lipstick?” she adds with a knowing smirk.

Alex’s eyes widen in shock. 

“What?” Sam replies. “You think a single mom can’t let loose?” Sam teases, nudging Alex with her elbow. 

Alex is shaking her head in disbelief. “That’s not exactly the thing that surprised me.”

Sam smirks. “I know. Come on. I’ll buy you a drink.”

Sam leads the way to the bar, where she flags down one of the bartender she knows and orders two shots of tequila and two beers. When the woman brings them over, her gaze moves to Alex, and she flashes Sam an approving look that Sam hopes Alex doesn’t catch. 

Sam takes the two shots and turns to Alex to find her eyes still surveying the bar, looking out at the dance floor already packed with bodies. Alex turns back and takes the glass from Sam’s hand. 

“To letting loose,” Sam says, toasting her glass to Alex’s before shooting it down.

She watches Alex smile and then do the same. They each reach for a beer. Sam reaches for Alex’s free hand and pulls her towards the dance floor. 

—

Later, the floor has become more crowded, the tight space heating Sam’s skin. They’ve already returned to the bar, two, no, three more times for drink after drink, and now she and Alex are back to dancing in the center of the crowd, their bodies swaying to the beat. The liquor has dampened Sam’s inhibitions just enough, and her eyes keep returning to Alex, to her long arms and narrow waist, to the way her hips move back and forth in perfect rhythm. She’s breathtaking, and Sam knows it isn’t the first time she’s noticed, but it’s the first time she’s let herself think those exact words. 

The space between them narrows with new bodies added to the floor, and Sam is moved closer to Alex, whose back is to her. Sam boldly slides her hand up to Alex’s hip and pulls her tighter until she is pressed against Alex’s frame, until she can feel the curve of Alex’s ass against her hips, until she can practically smell the scent of Alex’s skin at the nap of her neck. 

Alex doesn’t move away, and Sam wonders if she even knows it’s her, or if she’s just too liquored to care. 

Finally, Alex turns to face her, her hips not missing a single beat of the music, their bodies still tightly pressed together, but her eyes don’t meet Sam’s. Sam snakes her arm around Alex’s back and holds her tightly to her, their hips moving together in perfect sync. With each movement, Sam can feel the heat between them build, feels her own desire growing inside of her. 

Sam slides her hand under Alex’s shirt, damp with sweat, and runs her fingers over hot skin. Sam dips her head slightly towards Alex’s neck until her lips are just a breath away from her. 

Suddenly, Alex intakes a sharp breath of air, shifts her weight, and pulls away. 

“I need to use the bathroom,” Alex mutters under her breath before backing away and disappearing into the crowd. 

Sam pauses, breath uneven, body on edge, watching her go. She hesitates then takes a step, pushing through the crowd to follow her. 

Sam reaches the bathroom door. She taps her knuckles lightly. 

“Alex?” Sam calls out. 

She leans her ear closer to listen, but it’s only silence. She reaches her hand up to try the knob, and it’s unlocked. She opens it slowly. When she steps inside, she sees Alex leaning back against the sink, one hand on her head pushing the hair away from her face. 

Sam’s eyes roam over her, taking in her lean figure, the way her muscled shoulders are just slightly visible under her shirt, the way her jeans hug her legs tightly. 

Sam closes the door behind her. She locks it. She slowly steps closer to Alex, whose eyes are fixed on the opposite wall. The only sound is her steady breathing against the faded music from the club. The bass pumps through Sam’s body, echoing the pounding of her heart beat. 

Sam stops when she’s right in front of Alex, who is still staring straight ahead. Sam’s eyes move down Alex’s body. She lifts her hands to Alex’s waist, moving slowly and deliberately, sliding Alex’s shirt up slightly, her fingertips running gently over bare skin. Her hands move to Alex’s belt, unfastening it and then unbuttoning her jeans. She is about unzip Alex’s jeans when Alex lifts her hands to Sam’s waist, pushing her back roughly against the opposite wall, pressing her body into Sam’s. Their eyes meet momentarily before Alex’s mouth is on hers. Sam closes her eyes. Alex’s lips taste a little like whiskey, and it feels better than Sam had ever imagined. 

Sam moves down to Alex’s neck, letting her lips graze against her soft skin before drawing circles with her tongue. She hears Alex moan lightly at the contact, and the sound makes the ache between Sam’s legs swell, and god, she wants more- no, needs more.

Her hands move back to Alex’s waist, where she quickly works the zipper. Just as she places her palm to Alex’s stomach to slide between the fabric and her skin, she feels Alex’s hand grip her wrist to stop her. 

“Wait,” Alex says firmly. 

Sam freezes and pulls away, thinking maybe she’s pushed just a little too far. 

“I’m sorry,” Sam mumbles shamefully. 

“No,” Alex replies softly, her eyes finally meeting Sam’s. They’re warm and soft, and Sam’s nerves ease. Alex slides her arm around Sam’s waist and pulls her back to her. “Just...not here,” Alex says, her voice unsteady. “Let’s go to my place.”

“Okay,” Sam answers, trying to hide her smile, feeling both relieved and exhilarated by Alex’s invitation. 

—

Sam sits in the backseat of the Lyft with Alex, the space between them inches at most. Sam keeps her eyes, and her hands to herself.

Their driver is older, male, energetic.

“So where are you two ladies headed next?” His voice is grating.

“Home,” Sam answers. 

“That’s no fun. The night is young.”

“It is.”

“We need to find you ladies some company.” 

Sam looks over to see Alex’s on her.

“I think we have all the company we need, thanks,” Sam answers, her eyes never leaving Alex’s face. 

—

“Can I get you a drink?” Alex asks.

Sam follows her inside the apartment as Alex closes the door behind them. Alex flips on the switch, and the room is lit. Sam’s eyes survey the open loft; it’s structured, a little dark with specks on warmth where you might not expect, distinctively Alex Danvers. 

“Sure, what do you have?” Sam asks as she watches Alex slide over to the kitchen. 

Even though not half an hour ago, her hands were halfway down Alex’s pants, Sam finds it endearing that Alex’s first thought is to be the polite host, as if Sam isn’t here for one very obvious reason, and it isn’t for social niceties. 

“Whiskey in all it’s beautiful forms,” Alex replies with a small smile. 

“Which are you having?” Sam asks as she steps over to the opposite end of the counter, resting her elbows. 

“Scotch.”

“Scotch it is.”

Sam watches Alex reach up to the cupboard and pull down a couple glasses before grabbing a bottle of liquor from a serving cart. She pours two glasses and brings them around the counter until she’s next to Sam. She places one in her hand, and Sam takes a sip. Sam can tell by the taste Alex isn’t stocking cheap liquor, and she nods approvingly. Sam watches Alex bring the glass to her own lips, and Sam admires the way she takes it down easily. 

“So girls’ night was fun...” Alex states awkwardly.

Sam’s brows raise curiously.

“I meant at Kara’s.”

“Oh,” Sam says, chuckling. “Yeah, that was nice.”

“Can I get you anything else?”

“Look, Alex, you don’t have to pretend we both don’t know why I’m here. I think we both want the same thing. At least, it seemed that way at the bar.”

Alex sighs. “Just flatter me?” Alex pleads, knocking back another swig. “This isn’t really my thing.”

Alex sets the glass back down, fidgeting, and Sam finally realizes that Alex is nervous. 

“Women?” Sam teases with a smirk. 

“No, that’s definitely my thing,” Alex replies energetically, and Sam laughs. “One night stands?”

Sam nods. 

“Well, it can be just a night if you want. I thought of it more as friends helping friends.”

Alex laughs. “How generous of us.” 

“Mmhmm,” Sam nods, taking Alex’s glass from her and pushing it across the counter, away from her reach, before sliding her hand behind Alex’s neck. “Come on, let me show you how generous I am.”

Sam sees Alex’s eyes close just before she reaches her lips. This time, Sam takes her time with Alex, running her lips over hers, tasting her with her tongue, savoring the feel of their mouths on each other. Sam takes Alex’s bottom lip between her own, and Alex emits a soft moan. Sam pulls away slightly, taking in the look of bliss on Alex’s face, and she feels her heart flutter in a way she hadn’t anticipated when this night had started. She pushes away the sensation instead.

Alex’s eyes flutter back open.

“Take me to bed,” Sam whispers.

Alex only nods, reaching for Sam’s hand and guiding her across the living room. They take the two steps up, and Alex turns to face Sam. 

Sam’s lips curl into a smile at Alex’s soft, uneasy look. She backs Alex up until the back of her knees reach the bed before pushing her down onto the bed. 

Alex’s eyes are wide with a mix of surprise and desire as she looks back up at Sam.

Sam crawls on top of Alex, hips straddling her waist. Alex tries to sit back up, to reach her arms for Sam, but Sam finds her hands first and pins her down. 

Sam kisses her again, deeper this time, as she starts slowly grinding her core against Alex. Sam moves her mouth down to Alex’s neck, sliding her tongue against her skin, tasting the faint hint of salt lingering there. 

Alex tries to reach for Sam’s waist, grasping for skin, but Sam pushes her arms back down, intertwining their fingers and pinning Alex’s hands above her head. Sam’s lips finds Alex’s again, and she moves her hips against her just a little harder, feeling heat surging through her like fire. Alex wrestles against Sam more forcefully now, and even though Sam knows she must be holding back her strength, she’s enjoying Alex letting her maintain dominance. With every second, Sam can feel Alex’s desire growing, her need for control building. 

Sam finally releases Alex’s wrists, and Alex pushes herself up immediately, Sam now in Alex’s lap. Alex’s movements are desperate, needy. She grasps for Sam’s shirt, pulling it over her head. Her hands wrap around Sam, just before she flips her onto her back so that she is on top of her now. Alex slips off her own shirt then leans down to place her mouth on Sam’s body. Her hand reaches behind Sam’s back where she unclasps her bra.

Their clothes are quickly discarded until they are skin to skin. Sam savors the feeling of Alex’s weight on her body, of her strong hands on her, covering every inch of skin. Sam’s entire body is on fire, her center aching for Alex’s touch. She slides her hands down Alex’s back and over the curve of her ass, gripping tightly.

Finally, as if Alex knew she couldn’t possibly wait any longer, Sam feels Alex’s hand slide up her thigh and between her legs.

“Oh, god,” Sam moans at the contact. 

“You’re so wet,” Alex whispers into Sam’s ear, her voice low and husky. 

Alex’s fingers slide against her softly, gently, but Sam needs more. 

“Please,” she begs, her voice no more than a whimper, but Alex finally relents.

Sam feels Alex’s fingers push inside of her. Her eyes close, a loud moan escaping from her lips. Alex starts out slow, sliding in and out. Sam grips tightly to Alex, hands pulling her tighter, legs wrapped around her, their bodies moving in rhythm together with the motion of Alex’s hand.

Sam feels the energy inside of her building, until finally it explodes, surging through her body in waves, her vision blurring, hands gripping tightly to the sheets, her body arching in pleasure. 

When, finally, the waves fade, her eyes open again. Her breathing is ragged. Alex is still above her, looking down at her with those soft brown eyes. Sam reaches her hand behind Alex’s neck, tangling her fingers in her auburn hair and pulling her in to kiss her. Sam slides her tongue against Alex’s bottom lip and hears her moan into her mouth. 

Sam pushes Alex onto her back and slides on top of her. She straddles her waist, leaning down, her hair cascading around Alex’s face. Sam moved her mouth to Alex’s neck, trailing kisses down her skin to her chest. She slides her tongue over one of Alex’s breasts while her hand covers the other. Alex writhes beneath her, pleading for more, but Sam takes her time, exploring the curves of her body. 

Sam moves down the length of her. She hears Alex groan in disappointment at the loss of contact, but it’s only momentary. Sam pushes Alex’s thigh up with one hand until it’s bent at the hip, her other reaching behind Alex’s body to the small of her back. She drops her head and places her mouth between Alex’s legs.

“Fuck,” Alex mutters to Sam’s satisfaction.

One of Alex’s hands reaches for the headboard, gripping it tightly as Sam slides her tongue against her. Alex is hot and wet, and Sam loves the taste of her, loves the way Alex bucks her hips against her needily, the way Alex tangles her fingers in Sam’s hair, the way she begs her not to stop. 

When Alex comes, Sam grasps her tightly, feeling her rock against her, listening to the way her moans loudly echo through the space, and Sam feels her heart swell once more, just before she vehemently shoves the feeling back down. 

—

Later, Sam lies beside Alex, her upper body propped up on her elbow, looking down at Alex. Every inch of Sam’s body is still buzzing. They haven’t bothered with clothes. The sheets are haphazardly draped around them. Sam runs the fingers of her free hand over Alex’s body, her skin pale next to Sam’s own olive complexion. 

Alex has relaxed in comparison to earlier that night, and Sam is grateful. There’s a comfort now between them, an intimacy that’s seemed to have appeared.

Sam, stoked by curiosity, has just asked Alex when the last time she took a women to bed was.

Alex laughs in response, the sound smooth and rich. 

“Well, I think maybe I was the one taken. But last month. Sara Lance,” Alex answers, articulating the name, like it means something to her.

“Wow, I get a last name too. Must have been legendary.”

Alex chuckles, and Sam feels like she’s inadvertently made a joke. 

“What?”

Alex simply shakes her head. “It’s nothing. She’s a friend of a friend of Kara’s. It was at a wedding. We were drunk. But I think we’d be friends if we lived in the same place. She gave me some good advice.”

“Drunk advice?” Sam asks, amused.

“No, no... she’s, um, in a similar line of work. We worked a case together.”

Sam nods, wondering to herself if Alex has a type, and if that is it, women like Alex, women in law enforcement, women completely unlike herself. 

“Gotcha.”

“What about you?” Alex asks her. 

“Oh, it’s been a few,” Sam replies with a dismissive wave of the hand. 

“A few what? Days?” Alex teases.

Sam laughs. “I wish. Months. I don’t remember her name,” she adds, nudging Alex playfully. 

“That’s not bad. I’ve definitely gone longer,” Alex replies. 

Sam’s mouth drops open slightly in shock. “Wait, longer than months?”

Alex grimaces. “Guilty.”

“Wow. How’d you fight the ladies off for so long?”

“It’s easy if you don’t know that you want them,” Alex answers, laughing. 

Sam freezes in disbelief. “You’re joking.”

“That hard to believe?”

“I mean, look at you. The badge, the gun, the leather jacket. You’re like a lesbian fantasy.”

“So are you saying you’ve had fantasies about me?” Alex asks with a smirk. 

“You thought tonight was an accident?” Sam replies, brows raised. 

Alex releases a laugh, her face flushing red with embarrassment. 

“Wow. My gaydar is truly shit.”

Sam smiles, leaning down to rest her head on the pillow beside Alex.

“In your defense, as far as dates goes, you can solidly put that one in the years category for me, and I think that somehow deactivated the signals I put off.”

“Your gay vibes?”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah something like that.”

Alex turns her body until she is lying on her side too, facing Sam. She lifts her hand to Sam’s waist, sliding from the valley to the rise of her hip. 

“This is so not how I expected my night to go,” Alex remarks, her eyes wide. 

“So you weren’t planning to bed some unsuspecting woman, Alex Danvers?” 

“I’d hardly call you unsuspecting.”

“True. Well, that was my plan for the night.” 

“And how’d it go?”

“I have to say, I think it went swimmingly,” Sam replies with a playful self-satisfied smirk. 

“You’re pretty proud of yourself, aren’t you?”

“Look at you,” Sam answers, running her hand down Alex’s stomach, her eyes taking her in with admiration. “What’s not to be proud of?” 

She stops short of sliding between Alex’s legs, of feeling her again, wanting once again to see her arching in ecstasy. 

“It’s late though,” she says instead, taking her hand back. “I should go.”

“It’s already 4am,” Alex says, shaking her head. “Stay.”

“No, I still have to get my car. Ruby will be home early,” Sam counters, lifting her body until she’s seated.

“I’ll drive you in the morning,” Alex replies with a warm smile. 

“You don’t have to do that.”

“What happened to friends helping friends?” Alex asks, teasing, the corner of her mouth upturned. 

Sam laughs and relents. “Touché,” she says before sliding back down.

Alex reaches out her arm, offering her shoulder to Sam. She hesitates momentarily, not used to this display of affection, but Sam reminds herself that it’s Alex, kind, sweet Alex, and she’s just being a good friend, exactly as Sam had said this all was. Nothing more. 

As Sam settles her head into the crook of Alex’s arm, as she closes her eyes and lets the comfort of slumber settle in, she realizes that she can’t remember the last time she’s done this, stayed the night, fallen asleep in someone’s arms, and her last thought before her mind drifts to sleep is just how good it feels.


	2. Chapter 2

It’s another three weeks before Sam sees Alex again. Kara has organized another party, a game night, this time with a few more invites. Her apartment is more bustling than it is for girls’ nights. Music plays, liquor bottles line the kitchen counter, the hum of voices and laughter filling the space. She sits at the coffee table with a couple of Kara’s friends playing a board game. 

Sam had heard Kara say that Alex would be coming, but Sam’s been there two hours now, and there’s been no sign of her. Every knock on the door draws her attention, and she would be lying if she tried to say she didn’t feel disappointed every time it wasn’t her on the other side. 

She chastises herself for being so preoccupied by the uncertainty of her arrival. Besides, they had left things open-ended after their last encounter, distinctively vague in a way that made Sam question whether it really would just be a solitary incident, but that didn’t mean it hadn’t kept her up at night. The memory of Alex’s touch was seared in her mind. 

At nearly 8pm sharp, there’s another knock on the door. Sam’s gaze lifts expectantly, and she sees Kara bounding to the door energetically. Sam feels her body tense in a way that surprises her. 

When the door opens, it’s Alex. Sam watches her step inside, watches Kara wrap her arms around her older sister’s neck, sees her smile and laugh about something Sam can’t hear, sees Kara finally release her. 

Alex’s gaze meet hers almost instantaneously. Alex is in slim dark pants, a fitted navy top under a leather jacket, which she smoothly shrugs off. Sam basks in the sight of her, eyes taking her in up and down with a slight smirk.

Sam watches Alex fidget at the attention, sees her bite her bottom lip, that lip that Sam had not forgotten the taste of, and for a second, it feels like there is no one else in the room. 

“Sam! Your turn!” Kara’s friend Winn exclaims, and it pulls her gaze back. 

She forces a smile, not because she’s not enjoying the company, but because one thing she has realized about other adults, adults without kids, is that find nostalgic board games on a Saturday night fun because they don’t already spent most Saturday nights playing board games.

Sam plays her turn and then shakes the ice in her empty glass, announcing that she needs a refill. She stands to her feet, eyeing Alex across the room as the other woman grabs some ice from the fridge and mixes herself a drink. Sam makes her way over until she’s beside Alex, mere inches between their hips. Sam sets her glass down on the counter. Alex doesn’t turn her head just yet, giving Sam a chance to glance over her long neck, her angled jaw. 

“Scotch?” Sam asks, gesturing towards the drink.

Alex smirks. “I wish. Kara doesn’t stock any of the good stuff. Gotta settle for a rum and coke.”

Sam reaches her hand over to Alex’s glass where her hand is still on it. Sam deliberately lets their fingers graze. Sam senses Alex’s body tighten. She takes the glass from her and downs a swig. 

“Can I make you one?” Alex offers. 

“Sure,” Sam replies with a small nod.

Alex takes Sam’s glass from her hand and adds new ice and mixes her a cocktail, before sliding it over to Sam. Alex drops her gaze down to her drink again as she swirls the dark liquid. 

“So are you doing anything later?” Alex asks shyly, tentatively. 

“Are you interested in giving me something to do?” Sam replies as she tries to hide a knowing smirk. 

The corner of Alex’s mouth turns up. “Maybe. Do you have a curfew?”

“10am. Is that enough time?”

“I think it’ll do.”

—

Alex reaches out her hand and curls her fingers around the waist of Sam’s jeans, tugging her roughly into the apartment. Alex pushes Sam back up against the door, closing it behind them, pressing her body into Sam’s. It feels good. Alex’s hands grips Sam’s hips. Their eyes meet. 

“I started thinking you weren’t going to show,” Alex remarks, the corner of her mouth turned up, revealing to Sam how satisfied she is that she was wrong. 

Before Sam can reply, Alex’s lips find hers, and Sam relaxes into the sensation, all the stress of this week, the endless board meetings and mind-numbing conference calls and the failed merger all dissolving in the wake of Alex’s touch. Alex’s mouth leaves hers and moves to Sam’s neck, her lips trailing kisses from her hairline down to her shoulder. 

“It’s Lena,” Sam says between gasps for her, her knees feeling weak. “I think she could tell I was lying,” she explains, recalling how Lena had raised a brow at her when she had insisted she needed to return to the office and finish some budget reviews. 

“Mmm, well, remind me to overstay my welcome next time she’s at Kara’s.” 

Sam laughs, as she feels Alex’s hands slide up her shirt. She reaches her hands up to Alex’s neck, tangling her fingers in the short auburn locks and pulling her closer. 

“You should have called. It would have given me an out,” Sam tells her. 

Alex lifts her gaze to Sam as her hands reach down to unfasten the button and zipper of Sam’s jeans. Sam loves that Alex is taking the lead, that she’s easily discarded the anxiousness and nerves of their last encounter, because Alex’s desperate desire for her is sending heat through Sam’s body and what she needs after this week is for someone to take control.

“I don’t have your number,” Alex explains. 

Sam cocks her head in surprise, but Alex is right. A detail they’d both overlooked when they’d said goodbye a few weeks ago. 

“Oh yeah. We have to fix that.”

“Uh huh,” Alex says, her hands reaching for Sam’s shirt and pulling it off over her head, until Sam’s skin is bare. Alex’s eyes scan over her, biting her lip as she takes her in, and Sam already feels like she might explode. “Later,” Alex finally adds before reaching for Sam’s waist and pulling her in for another kiss. 

— 

This time around, by the time they had reached the bed, their clothes had already been disposed of. 

Alex has Sam pinned down on the bed on her stomach. Alex’s mouth is at the nap of her neck, trailing kisses, while her hands spread over Sam’s bare body. Sam still has the taste of Alex’s center on her lips, still feels electrified by the way her body had shook at Sam’s touch. Now, she can feel the weight of Alex’s body pressed into her, feel Alex’s breasts against her back, the wetness between Alex’s legs on her skin, and it’s driving her crazy with want. 

Alex kisses down her back, her lips moving over her shoulder blades and the bumps of her spine. She reaches the small of Sam’s back and then reaches her hands to grip Sam’s hips, lifting her ass in the air so she’s positioned on her knees. 

And then it’s Alex’s tongue, first sliding up the inside of her thigh before moving to the other, before finally reaching Sam’s center.

“Oh, god,” Sam gasps as Alex’s tongue slides against her folds with slow, languid movements. 

Sam’s hands grip the sheets as she moves her hips back against Alex, begging for more. Finally, Alex’s tongue moves away, and Sam feels Alex slides two fingers deep inside of her. Sam releases a long deep moan at the sensation. Gradually, Alex’s movements quicken, and Sam can feel the energy building inside her until she is almost there.

Just before she comes, Sam feels Alex’s fingers retreat. 

“Please don’t stop,” Sam pleads, and she can hear a soft laugh from Alex’s lips.

Next, she feels Alex flip her over onto her back, and a moment later, Alex is hovering over her. Sam’s eyes take in those deep brown eyes and those lips that are turned into the slightest smirk. Alex’s arms snake behind Sam’s back, and she is lifted up into Alex’s lap in one smooth motion, her legs wrapping around Alex’s body, her arms around Alex’s neck. Their eyes lock. Sam’s breathing is ragged, and the way Alex is looking at her is overwhelming.

Alex leans in to kiss her again, and it’s softer and slower than Sam had expected, like she’s taking the time to memorize Sam’s lips. Alex’s mouth runs over Sam’s chin and down to her neck, and her hand moves between them. Sam presses her body closer for more contact until she feels Alex slip inside of her again. Sam’s fingers tangle in Alex’s hair, as their bodies begin moving together. The energy once again grows inside Sam’s core, as she grips tightly to Alex’s body, hips thrusting against Alex’s fingers.

Alex’s presses harder and deeper into her, and Sam whimpers when Alex pushes another finger inside of her. Finally, finally, Sam comes, shaking, crying out Alex’s name, waves of electricity rushing through her body, her vision blurring until the only sensation is Alex’s touch.

Sam’s breathing finally slows, and she’s still clinging to Alex. Her arms are still around Alex’s neck, and Sam settles her chin on to Alex’s shoulder. She can feels Alex dip her head down and place the softest kiss on her shoulder. 

It’s so gentle, it leaves Sam breathless. 

—

Later, Sam lies on her back under the sheets, her head on Alex’s pillow, her head a tousled mess of brown waves. Alex is sitting up in the bed against the headboard, a sheet drawn over her body.

“God I needed that,” Sam breathes. 

Alex laughs. “I could tell. Long week?”

“Very,” Sam laments. “Too many assholes in suits. If I’d had to deal with another condescending prick this week, I might have handed Lena my resignation.”

“Ouch,” Alex says with a playful grimace. 

“I just really needed this week to be over.”

“Tell me about it,” Alex agrees with an exasperated sigh. 

“Yeah?” Sam asks. “What happened?”

Alex shakes her head. “It’s not worth rehashing.”

“Oh, come on,” Sam counters.

“Sam, you don’t have to ask me about work. It’s fine. I know this isn’t...”

“Isn’t what?” Sam asks, pushing herself up until she’s seated, facing Alex eye to eye. 

“A thing,” Alex says carefully. “A relationship,” Alex adds awkwardly, like it’s a swear word. 

“We’re still friends,” Sam insists. “And I’m actually genuinely curious. What exactly does an FBI agent spend her days doing?”

Alex smiles a little. “That’s classified.”

“Fine, give me vague terms. You track down suspects? Do sting operations? Go undercover? Risk your life saving others?”

“All of the above?” Alex answers. 

“You’re not risking your life every day though, right?” Sam questions. “I mean, how often is your life is in danger? Like a couple times a year?” 

“God, too often to count,” Alex replies. “Weekly?

Sam shakes her head in disbelief. “You’re exaggerating, right?”

Alex laughs. “If anything, I’m probably underestimating.”

“Jesus, it’s a good thing you’re not my girlfriend.” 

“Um, thanks?” Alex replies playfully. 

But Sam catches a look of sadness cross Alex’s face before it’s quickly pushed away, and she acknowledges that it’s easy to see how Alex could make a career as an undercover operative, that she’s good at hiding her emotions.

“No, I just mean-“ Sam starts, realizing she’s hit a nerve, even if Alex would never admit it. “God, I would worry like a crazy person.”

“Well, luckily I’m nobody’s girlfriend.”

“Well, it’s lucky for me,” Sam replies suggestively, running her hand up Alex’s thigh and drawing a small smile from Alex. “And I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by that.”

“It’s fine,” Alex insists. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sam offers, the “it” being the breakup, the ex, the ended engagement, the called-off wedding; she’s unsure what to even call it, if she should even try to name it. 

“No, definitely no,” Alex answers, shaking her head emphatically. “Let’s not do that.”

Sam nods and lets the topic go. She glances over at the clock on Alex’s wall. It’s even later than she thought, but she shouldn’t be surprised. Truth be told, she never was surprised by Alex’s stamina, but more so, her own. She never knew her desire for someone physically could be so strong, that she could burn so intensely under someone’s touch, that she could want more and more and never feel like she’d had enough. 

“Are you hungry?” Sam asks, breaking the silence. “I’m hungry. Do you have any food?”

“Hmm, no,” Alex says with a laugh. “I can order you something?”

Sam flashes her a look like she’s crazy. “It’s half past two.”

Alex shrugs. “I know all the 24 hour spots.”

Sam slides out from under the sheets and stands to her feet, feeling Alex’s eyes on her nakedness. She’d be lying if she tried to say she didn’t like the way Alex looked at her, how her eyes took her in with admiration. 

“You must have something,” Sam insists, looking back at Alex from over her shoulder as she crosses the apartment. 

Sam reaches the refrigerator and pulls it open; glancing at its contents: a few cans of Diet Coke, a case of pale ale, a styrofoam container of leftovers, a jar of pickles, a few sticks of butter, and a Bottle of salad dressing. 

Sam laughs. Wow, I should really learn you don’t exaggerate.” 

“What can I say? I’m a woman of my word,” Alex calls out playfully from her spot on the bed.

Sam looks back at her and releases a light chuckle. She closes the fridge door and pulls open the freezer to find a container of Rocky Road ice cream. She reaches for it and pulls off the lid, finding just a couple scoops left at the bottom.

After checking a few drawers and finally finding a spoon, Sam weaves her way back to the bed scooping spoonfuls into her mouth as she walks. She reaches the bed and crawls on top towards Alex. 

“Ice cream?” Sam offers “It makes everything better.”

Alex smiles but shakes her head. “I’m good.” 

Sam catches a twinge if sadness in her eyes again. 

“Look, Alex, I know I don’t know anything about your relationship. I only met Maggie the once, and it’s not even my business why you split,” Sam tells her sympathetically, reaching for Alex’s knee with her hand. “I’m just a bystander, but I imagine you maybe feel like you made a mistake, or that you’re gonna die alone now, and trust me, I know how that feels... But Alex, I promise you, it’s not true. You’re going to meet someone. _The_ one. Probably when you least expect it, okay?” 

Their eyes meet. The corner of Alex’s mouth turns up at the encouraging words. Alex finally nods and reaches for the ice cream from Sam’s hands, scooping herself a spoonful. 

—

This time around, whether Sam will sleep over isn’t even a discussion. After polishing off the ice cream, they settled under the sheets. Sam feels Alex curl her body around her back and drape her arm over Sam, feels the warmth emanating from Alex’s skin, feels Alex’s breath on the back of her neck, and it’s only moments before Sam is asleep. 

—

In the morning, Alex walks Sam out. Sam had tried to argue otherwise, but Alex was already dress in athletic clothes and sneakers for a run, and she had insisted it wasn’t walking her out if it was on her way. 

When they reach the street where Sam remembers parking outside of Alex’s downtown building, Sam halts on the sidewalk. 

“So where’d you park?” Alex wonders, and Sam’s eyes squint in confusion 

“Right here,” Sam explains, gesturing to the empty street as she silently curses. 

“You can’t park here at night,” Alex tells her with a frown. 

Sam nods. “I’m realizing that now.”

“Was someone in a bit of a hurry last night?”

Sam looks up to see Alex smirking at her playfully. Sam shakes her head at her teasing, her eyes moving over Alex’s body. She’s wearing a fitted tank and running tights that hug her in all the right ways. 

“Can you blame me?” 

“I guess I can’t,” Alex replies. “Last night was...

“Definitely worth it,” Sam finishes for her. 

“I’ll take you to the tow lot.” 

“No, Alex, I can call for a Lyft,” Sam argues 

“Wait here. I’ll grab my wallet upstairs and pull out of the garage,” Alex tells her and darts back towards the apartment building entrance before Sam can argue further. 

Minutes later, Sam lifts her head to the sound of an engine revving, and she looks up to see a motorcycle pulling. Alex slows the bike in front of Sam and pulls off her helmet, tousling her auburn hair with a slight shake of her head. 

Sam feels her mouth go dry at the sight. She bites her lower lip and shakes her head thinking to herself that she didn’t realize Alex Danvers could get any sexier, but she just did and god, _how dare she_. 

“You gonna get on?” Alex asks, and Sam takes the extra helmet from her outstretched hand. 

Sam pulls the helmet on and then slides onto the bike behind Alex, her legs on either side of Alex’s body. Sam reaches her hands around her waist and closes the space between their bodies

—

Half an hour and $300 later, Sam’s retrieved her car from the impoundment lot. She’s leaning back against the driver’s door of the Cadillac; Alex is standing a few inches away from her. The wind is blowing through her hair. 

“Thank you again for the ride,” Sam tells her with a touch of embarrassment to her voice. 

“Next time, I’ll let you in the garage,” Alex says with a laugh. 

_Next time..._ The words resonate in Sam’s mind, and it feels good knowing there will be a next time. Sleeping with Alex is even better than she had imagined, but if she had to admit it, it isn’t only about the sex. It’s the easy banter, the laughs, the flirting. She actually likes spending time with Alex, something she’d never found in this sort of arrangement before, and it’s surprising and refreshing and more than a little unexpected. 

Sam lingers outside her door, knowing she needs to say goodbye, the time ticking closer to Ruby’s return home. 

Part of her wants to reach out and hug Alex, but another part of her wants to feel her lips again, even if it’s wrong to. Sam knows that it’s against the unspoken rules for what this thing is, that what they have is supposed to be confined to closed doors and isn’t to be allowed out in the light of day. She reminds herself that it is girlfriends that kiss goodbye, and that this, this is just plain friendship. But as Sam leans in and wraps her arms around Alex, squeezing her gently, she starts to feel something about those previously agreed-upon terms blur, but she refuses to linger on the thought. Instead, she adamantly pushes it out of her mind and whispers, _goodbye_.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love these two, and I’m so sad we’re (probably) neve going to see them together on the show. 
> 
> Also, I’m still working on the next chapter of “All The Things,” it’s coming soon, but this is definitely easier to write since it’s so much lighter. Hope you all enjoy the update!
> 
> —

It’s halfway through the next week when Sam finally hears from Alex. Despite the lack of contact, Alex had been heavy on her mind. The last few days, Sam had found her thoughts drifting to Alex throughout her long days at the office, and at night, when she was in bed alone, when her absence felt more palpable. 

Despite her best efforts, she couldn’t get the image of Alex on her motorcycle out of her head, couldn’t stop thinking about the way it felt to have her legs wrapped around Alex’s body as they weaved through the streets of downtown National City. 

But a part of her knows it’s more than that. 

There’s a comfort, a closeness that seems to have started to form between them that Sam rarely finds, has rarely let herself develop with anyone, let alone someone she’s shared a bed with.

Sam isn’t sure what exactly prompts the text message from Alex on that day at that exact moment, but it brightens an otherwise abysmally slow Wednesday. 

_Thanks for the pep talk the other night_ , it says, a simple reference to their discussion in bed the other night, when Sam had assured Alex she would find love. Because, of course, Alex would. 

Alex could have any woman she wanted, Sam was sure of that. She didn’t know what had been the cause for the end of her relationship with Maggie, but she’d heard through the grapevine that it was Alex’s decision. She hadn’t thought much of it then, but considering it now, it doesn’t surprise her. Though Sam hasn’t known her long, she knows women like Alex aren’t that common. Honest, loyal, kind-hearted, sexy as hell, and not to mention, mind-numbingly good in bed. 

Alex would have her choice of suitors, when she was ready. 

Sam lifts the phone and types a message back.

 _Anytime_ , it says. _One of the perks of mothering an almost teenage girl is getting pretty good at those_ , she adds with a smiley face emoji.

Sam sets her phone back down, but before long, it alerts again. 

_Ruby’s one lucky kid._

Sam smiles to herself. Alex’s words are simple, and she probably doesn’t even realize how much weight they carry, but it means a lot to Sam for her to say them. Sam has felt guilty as a mother, guilt for all the years Ruby spent with a nanny so Sam could go back to school, all of the missed soccer goals when she was on a business call, and most of all, guilt that she couldn’t give her two parents. She’d tried so hard to make up for it by being super-mom, but there were always challenges, always shortcomings, always failures. 

So Alex saying that means more to her than Alex probably realizes, more than she might ever understand as someone who isn’t a parent, as someone with no plans to be one, so she’s grateful. She just doesn’t know how to say it, so she leaves the message unanswered, returning to the endless work on her desk so she can get out in time to be home for dinner with her Ruby.

—

Sam steps off on the 21st floor of Alex’s building and makes her way down the hall to the door at the end. It’s Saturday morning, and she knows there are a million other things she could be doing with two hours of free time, stopping by the office to review financial reports, calling the landscaper, taking the car in for a service, but all she could think of since she had woken up that morning was Alex. Alex’s skin and her voice. Alex’s weight pressed against her underneath her sheets, and Sam knew in the back of her mind that no matter how much she told herself otherwise, she couldn’t have stopped herself from sending that text. 

_Are you busy?_ she had typed, shamelessly as soon as Ruby had disappeared out of view at the park.

When Alex didn’t respond immediately, Sam had felt herself tense, wondering if Alex already had other, better things to do. Besides, it was Saturday morning. Maybe Alex had had someone over from the night before. She had found herself cringing at the thought. And maybe, she should have started with hello and some pleasantries, instead of the clear proposition it actually was.

_When?_ Alex had finally replied, simply. 

_Now. I just dropped Ruby at soccer practice. I have two hours free,_ Sam had answered. 

_Come over,_ Alex had replied quickly, sending a rush of heat and excitement through Sam. 

______It had only taken fifteen minutes to speed across town._ _ _ _ _ _

______Now, Sam taps three times on the door. She hears rustling on the other side before the door swings open and Alex appears. The apartment is flooded with sunshine, and still, Alex’s smile is the brightest thing in the room._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Morning,” Alex says as she steps aside to let Sam in._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hi,” Sam replies warmly as she takes Alex in like the breath of fresh air she is._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex is in joggers and a baggy sweatshirt, in sharp contrast to Sam’s slim dark pants, silk blouse, and pointed flats that she had dressed in that morning just in case Alex hadn’t answered, just in case she’d had enough self-control to stop at the office instead._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh wow, You’re still in pajamas,” Sam says, stepping inside and crossing to the kitchen counter where she sets her bag. “Were you still in bed? I’m sorry if I woke you. I clearly wasn’t thinking,” she adds, shaking her head apologetically and gesturing with her hands._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex smiles again. “You didn’t wake me, but...I was still in bed,” she admits with a flush of embarrassment._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam laughs. “I am both flummoxed and jealous.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Was it rude not to change?” Alex asks, as she self-consciously motions to her clothing. “I just didn’t see the point of getting undressed twice,” she adds with a small smile._ _ _ _ _ _

______“No, I like it,” Sam tells her, her eyes moving up and down Alex, taking in the way the fabric hugs her body, how soft she looks, how so much unlike an FBI agent Alex looks in leisurewear. “It’s kind of hot,” she adds, taking a few steps towards Alex._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Sweats?” Alex questions, brows raised._ _ _ _ _ _

______“On you, yes,” Sam says as she closes the space between them. She lifts her hand and slides it under Alex’s sweatshirt, across her stomach, taking in the softness of her skin. She reaches down and undoes the ties of Alex’s sweats. “I think I like them better off though,” she adds, smirking._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam then reaches her other hand up and slides it around Alex’s back, while the other moves up Alex’s stomach until it reaches her breast, feeling the fullness of it in her palm. Alex’s eyes close, like she’s savoring the feeling of Sam in her, and it only arouses Sam more. She pulls Alex closer and dips her head to Alex’s neck, letting her lips graze her skin. Sam slowly moves up to Alex’s ear._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Does that feel good?” Sam whispers._ _ _ _ _ _

______“God, yes,” Alex breathes._ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam divested Alex of her clothes quickly. They were naked in bed now, lying side by side, facing each other, Alex’s thigh draped over Sam’s, and Sam’s hand between Alex’s legs._ _ _ _ _ _

______Her fingers are deep inside of Alex, and Alex is moaning at each thrust as she grips tightly to Sam, like she’s the only thing grounding her. Alex is so wet, and her skin is so soft, and it all feels so perfect, the way Alex writhes under her touch, the way her body glistens, and Sam feel her chest pounding with this overwhelming tenderness that Alex seems to garner from her more and more._ _ _ _ _ _

______For a moment, a hitch of panic hits her chest, but she pushes it back down and just takes in the way Alex’s face looks as she comes apart in Sam’s arms._ _ _ _ _ _

______She leans in closer to Alex and whispers in her ear, “Come for me,” and Alex, breathless and shaking, does._ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam stands beside the bed, dressing, sliding her slacks on, as Alex lies in bed, a sheet loosely covering her naked body. She can feel Alex’s eyes on her movements, and it makes it strangely hard to leave, makes her want to crawl back in and spend the day in bed with her, but she reminds herself that’s exactly what she doesn’t have time for, doesn’t have space for. A relationship. She reminds herself this is a mutually beneficial arrangement, and that’s why it works._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What are you up to today?” Alex asks._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I am taking Ruby and her friend to a trampoline park,” Sam explains with a chuckle as she pulls on her blouse and starts buttoning it._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex laughs. “What exactly is a trampoline park?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“It’s literally like a football field sized warehouse with every sort of trampoline for children to risk their life on,” Sam replies facetiously._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That actually sounds kind of fun.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam laughs. “Sure. Says the woman who doesn’t want kids,” Sam replies as she slides on her flats and smooths her hair._ _ _ _ _ _

______“No, really though. I could go with you. Or take them and give you the day off,” Alex suggests._ _ _ _ _ _

______It catches Sam off guard. She looks up at Alex with brows furrowed, perplexed. She shakes her head._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Wow, you really are the cool aunt. That’s really nice of you to offer, but...” Sam hesitates, shifting her weight, not knowing how to say no, that she just can’t, that there is something about being with Alex around Ruby that terrifies her, that would somehow shift things irrevocably, that would disrupt this easy-going, no-strings-attached affair they’ve been enjoying._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yeah, no, of course,” Alex replies, dismissing the idea with a head shake._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam tilts her head to the door to signal her impending departure, and Alex slides out of bed, giving Sam another glimpse of her body before she pulls on a navy blue silk robe._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex walks her to the front door, and Sam lingers on this side of it, bag thrown over her shoulder._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m sorry to be your alarm clock, but this was nice,” Sam says, her hand lifting up so her fingers can twist around the tie of Alex’s robe, wanting to tug her closer again, undress her again, put her mouth on her body once more._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’ll take this alarm clock over my normal one any day,” Alex replies with a smile._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Is that an open invitation?” Sam asks, smirking._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I think you already know that answer.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex tugs at her bottom lip, and Sam fights the urge to pull her in to kiss her._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’ll see you, Alex.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Bye, Sam.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______Weeks pass. They settle into a steady rhythm. It’s not as frequent as Sam would probably like, but they make time. Besides, her priority first and foremost is Ruby, but this, this is a more than welcome distraction from her responsibilities, from the drowning pressure of running L-Corp while trying to be the perfect, present mother. In Alex’s arms, she can relax and let go and let someone else take control, make all of the decisions for her, take care of her needs, and god, does Alex do it well._ _ _ _ _ _

______So they find spare moments whenever they can, in between board meetings and soccer games and conference calls, in between whatever life risking ventures of Alex’s agent life that Sam chooses not to imagine lest she worry._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sometimes, she will text Alex in the middle of the day. She’ll tell Lena she has a lunch meeting. She’ll drive over to Alex’s downtown apartment._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sometimes, Alex will be waiting out front of L-Corp in her black SUV with the tinted windows, her arm slung over the steering wheel. Sam will slip inside; she’ll keep her hands to herself as the anticipation grows in the short ride to Alex’s apartment, where, by the moment they’ve shut the door, it has built up so much, they don’t waste a moment with pleasantries._ _ _ _ _ _

______When she returns to the office later, Sam will try to smooth out the wrinkles in her suit and the bed head from her hair._ _ _ _ _ _

______These daytime encounters are always quick, they have to be, but they are always good. By now, Alex knows just what Sam likes, and Sam knows exactly how to make Alex come._ _ _ _ _ _

______Other times, it will be in the evening, after work, when Ruby is seeing a movie with a friend, or after a get together with Lena and Kara, when Ruby has a sleepover, and she knows she’ll get Alex all night long._ _ _ _ _ _

______One night, when Ruby is at a friend’s and Alex gets held up with work, instead of meeting at Alex’s, she comes to Sam’s for the first time. When the knock on the door comes, Sam is on the couch, watching the news, a report on Supergirl getting knocked around by National City’s latest villain, and knowing Alex works with her, she wonders if Alex had been there too._ _ _ _ _ _

______When Alex does arrive, she’s wearing an unmarked black polo and pants. There’s a bruise developing on her jaw. There are cuts on her knuckles with traces of dried blood. And Sam knows she’s come from the fight, and the look on Alex’s face says she doesn’t want to talk about it even if she could._ _ _ _ _ _

______After delicately peeling off Alex’s clothes, she pulls her into the shower, where Sam presses Alex against the wall. She drops to her knees, pulls Alex’s thigh over her shoulder, and her mouth finds Alex’s center, her tongue sliding against her until Alex is screaming and writhing and her knees are weak._ _ _ _ _ _

______That night, after they are both spent, Sam pulls Alex close in bed, wraps her arms around her and holds her. Before Alex falls asleep, Sam swears she can feel tears sliding down Alex’s cheeks, and she wonders what’s weighing so heavy on her heart, what burden she’s carrying around on her shoulders._ _ _ _ _ _

______The next morning, Alex is gone before Sam wakes, a simple text saying she had to get back to the bureau, and neither of them bring up the night again._ _ _ _ _ _

______Gradually, this thing between them, that has become far more than casual sex, but she wouldn’t dare call a relationship, becomes something Sam relies on, something that punctuates a stressful week or gives her someone to share her highlights with. It’s easy. And Sam hasn’t felt this good in a while. There’s a lightness to her step she hasn’t felt in a long time._ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Can’t you eat after?” Sam asks, her arms draped around Alex’s waist from behind, her mouth on the nape of Alex’s neck, urging her to leave the slice of pizza in the box, the box she’d picked up on her way over to Alex’s after Kara had last minute cancelled girls’ night due to a hot story that needed covering._ _ _ _ _ _

______It’s been two weeks since they last saw each other, but even longer since she’d seen Kara, so she felt a little guilty feeling glad about the cancellation, but she needed this. She might never admit that she’d been missing Alex, but it feels so good to see her again._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex takes a bite of the slice. “I don’t want this to cool off,” she protests._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam slides her tongue up Alex’s neck to her ear._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What if I cool off?” she replies seductively, her hands squeezing Alex’s narrow waist._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex chuckles with amusement at Sam’s neediness._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You never cool off,” Alex says, turning in Sam’s arms until they’re facing each other._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hm. Touché,” Sam admits with a smirk._ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex takes another bite and swallows it down. With her free hand, she snakes it around Sam’s back and slides it under her shirt, pulling her flush against her._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Besides,” Alex continues, her brow raised sharply, a flirtatious upturn of the corner of her mouth. “I need sustenance so that I can fuck you properly.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam feels her face flush with heat that quickly radiates through her whole body._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hard to argue with that,” Sam replies, biting her lower lip, as she takes a step back, leaving Alex and her knowing smirk to her slice of pepperoni._ _ _ _ _ _

______Two hours later, sweating, panting, moaning, Alex’s fingers thrusting deep inside of her, all Sam can think of is how Alex had made good on her promise._ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam sits up on bed, leaning against the headboard. The sheet is draped over her. Alex is sitting cross legged facing her, a pair of boy cut underwear the only thing covering her frame. The box of cold pizza is between them; Sam polishes off a slice as her eyes casually dart over to the distraction of Alex’s skin. It doesn’t matter that she’s seen it now, dozens of times over; the sight still transfixes her._ _ _ _ _ _

______She averts her gaze before she’s looked so long that Alex will notice, and her eyes move around the apartment that has become so comfortable and familiar after all these days and nights here._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I always wanted a place like this,” Sam remarks._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Like what?” Alex asks, her eyes narrowed with curiosity, probably wondering why someone with a three bedroom house would have any desire for a studio apartment._ _ _ _ _ _

______“A place with no walls,” she tries to explain, but the confusion on Alex’s face only grows. “Not literally per se, but what it means,” Sam continues. “Every space here is yours. You don’t need to close a door to separate your space from someone else’s.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex nods with understanding. “You never had your own place.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“When I first left home, I was at a shelter. Kind of the exact opposite of my own place,” Sam explains as she thinks back to that day she left home with only a backpack and a photo of Ruby’s ultrasound, the way the fear had been overwhelming, how she had walked for miles until she’d reached the bus station in her tinytown and caught the next one to National City with all the money she’d saved up from waitressing at the diner. How it had felt that first night in the shelter, amongst row after row of cots filled with runaways and battered women, all hoping for more. But she doesn’t tell Alex any if that. No one wants to hear that, she reminds herself._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I worked, saved up some money,” she continues instead. “I finally got an apartment, but it was just before Ruby was born. It was awful though. Tiny, dark, dank. God, I cried so many nights in that place,” Sam says softly before she has a chance to halt her own honesty._ _ _ _ _ _

______There’s a long silence, and Sam senses that Alex is reading her body language and choosing not to pry further about the experience._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Did you always know that you wanted kids?” Alex finally asks, her voice soft and tentative, and the candor of the question surprises Sam. No one’s ever asked her this before, and she’s sure it’s because no one really ever thought the answer mattered. She had one, what did it matter if she had wanted one._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh god, I didn’t know what I wanted,” Sam admits, shaking her head. “I mean, I was still a kid too.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“That must have been terrifying,” Alex says softly, and when Sam catches her eyes, it feels like she’s seeing right into her soul._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam quickly averts her eyes again at the feeling of vulnerability that suddenly permeates her heart._ _ _ _ _ _

______“It was. Up until the moment I saw her face. It wouldn’t have mattered anymore what I thought I wanted or didn’t want. In just one second, everything changed. She was everything. Everything from there on out was for her,” she says, meeting Alex’s eyes again, where she could swear she sees them glisten with tears. “I didn’t know I could love something that much.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Wow,” Alex says, nodding and dropping her head._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam instantly feels guilty, like she’s said the wrong thing, that she’s upset Alex._ _ _ _ _ _

______“But I get that it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay,” Sam adds swiftly._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You’re right. It’s not,” Alex admits sadly. “It wasn’t...for Maggie...”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The words slowly sink in. Sam’s eyes move over Alex’s face as she realizes she’d had Alex all wrong._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You mean...”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Kids, yeah.” Alex nods, finally looking up to meet Sam’s eyes._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You want them...”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I do. That’s why I ended it.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh...” Sam whispers. “This whole time I’d just assumed...”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“That’s not on you. I never corrected you.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“So you two had never discussed whether you wanted kids?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex shakes her head. “I know. It was rushed. We moved too quickly. I just didn’t think I had to ask. I mean, who doesn’t want kids?” Alex adds, giving an exaggerated shrug of both confusion and dismay._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam releases a deep sigh. “A lot of people. Trust me, I speak from experience.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex’s face falls, and Sam realizes what her words have implied._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh god, no, that’s not- I’m an asshole,” Sam says, pushing the pizza box out from between them and reaching for Alex’s hand. “I am undoing my rallying pep talk from weeks ago.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“You’re just being honest.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Look, my experience is not going to be yours. I’m... jaded. Plenty of people want kids, their own kids, that they get to raise. They just don’t want to jump in to a preteen who is very opinionated and more than occasionally insolent,” Sam explains._ _ _ _ _ _

______And to be honest, Sam has accepted that this is her life. She had given up on finding a partner a long time ago, and right now, everything was about Ruby anyway. She was almost a teenager; it wasn’t like things were going to get any simpler. She didn’t have time for a relationship, not without sacrificing the time she has to be a mother. And to risk heart break when someone could up and leave was one thing when it was her own, another when it was her daughter’s. So she’d accepted what life had given her and was making the best of it._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh, come on, Ruby is a great kid,” Alex insists. “You’ve done great with her, and anyone who would walk away from the two of you because you’re a package deal is the real asshole,” Alex tells her with so much tenderness that Sam almost believes her._ _ _ _ _ _

______And for a moment, she thinks that maybe Alex could be right, maybe someday, there will be someone for her._ _ _ _ _ _

______But not now._ _ _ _ _ _

______“And here I thought I was the one giving the pep talk.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well,” Alex’s says, smirking just slightly. “I have a little sister, so I’m not too bad at them either.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, thank you,” Sam whispers, smiling softly and nodding, her hands lingering on Alex’s._ _ _ _ _ _

______Their eyes lock for a long moment, and Sam feels her heart stutter. Slowly, tentatively, she leans in. Alex’s eyes close just before their lips meet, and despite all the bruising kisses over weeks spent in bed, this soft one feels like the most arresting._ _ _ _ _ _

______Sam pulls away slightly, scared if she’s been too gentle, too tender, too delicate for what they’ve agreed that this would be._ _ _ _ _ _

______But when Alex’s eyes lift open, her only words are a simple question._ _ _ _ _ _

______“How much time do we have?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Enough,” Sam whispers as she leans in and kisses her again._ _ _ _ _ _

______—_ _ _ _ _ _

______Alex is asleep when Sam finally leaves. She puts away the leftover pizza and tidies up the kitchen. Before she goes, she walks back to the bed where Alex is sprawled out in peaceful slumber, and Sam takes her in once more, thinking how she’s maybe never seen someone, known someone, quite this beautiful before, and it’s so much that it almost hurts._ _ _ _ _ _

______The last thing Sam does is gently pull the comforter over Alex’s naked frame before she exits quietly._ _ _ _ _ _


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something a bit lighter after the latest “All The Things” chapter. Hope you all enjoy ;)

It’s three weeks later, a Saturday night, when girls’ night is finally rescheduled. Like most nights, Sam sits on the floor of Kara’s place with her usual now-empty wine glass on the coffee table in front of her. Lena and Kara are curled up on the sofa where they’ve gotten only slightly better at keeping their hands to themselves. Alex is in a chair across from Sam, legs crossed underneath her, wearing tight dark jeans and a grey buttoned shirt. It’s a routine that Sam has grown accustomed to, welcomed into her otherwise routine life. Sam knows that, from the outside, nothing really has changed about the nature of these nights, but it’s obvious that over the last few months, Alex has.

Her laughter is lighter, her smile more carefree. Quips roll off her tongue without hesitation. No one talks about it, at least not to Sam, but it’s noticeable. Alex is different. Happier. As though whatever inside of her that had been fragmented by her loss was coming back together.

The result is an energy exuding from her that is magnetic in a way that makes Sam unable to keep her eyes off of her tonight.

“Sam, you should come!” Kara exclaims, pulling Sam from her thoughts.

“Do you have plans?” Alex asks, drawing Sam’s gaze back. Her brown eyes are soft, knowing.

It’s late November now, and the conversation had inevitable drifted to Thanksgiving. Kara had been expounding on her big annual family feast, when the question had turned to Sam.

Sam gives a quick head shake in reply to Alex’s question, even as she knows Alex already knows the answer.

“Just the usual, home with Rubes.”

“You have to come then,” Kara tells her excitedly.

“Please come. I need you there,” Lena begs, drawing a soft laugh from Alex that Sam feels in her gut.

Kara’s head snaps to look at Lena, mouth slightly agape. “What does that mean?”

“Nothing, darling,” Lena says quickly, patting Kara on the thigh.

“Our mother will be there is what Lena means,” Alex explains to Sam.

Sam nods, her eyes moving back to Lena who is giving a slight grimace of fear, and laughs.

“Eliza will love you,” Kara tells Lena insistently.

“Mothers never like me,” Lena replies. “Even my own.” Lena turns back to Sam. “So please, if not for the abundance of food, please come for the exceedingly grateful company.”

“It’s not intruding?” Sam asks hesitantly. 

“Of course not!” Kara exclaims.

Sam looks to Alex. Despite Kara’s insistence and Lena’s pleading, its Alex’s blessing that she seeks the most, especially as they’d already made their own plans known and no invitations had been extended by either.

“Alex?” she asks, trying to keep her voice casual, even though she’s trying with her eyes to ask so much more than she can say.

Is it too much? She wants to know. Is attending her family holiday too intimate? Is this too much mixing of business and pleasure? It’s one thing to spend their evenings with Kara and Lena, another with Alex’s mother. Sure, they are friends, but this relationship, for lack of a better word, has its boundaries.

Alex gives her a small reassuring smile in reply, the kind that turns up the corner of her lips and lets Sam know that whatever she is getting at with her questioning eyes isn’t anything to be worried about.

“We’d love to have you,” Alex says. “And Ruby too. I haven’t seen in her in ages!”

“Ok, it’s settled. We’ll be there,” Sam answers.

“Good!” Kara exclaims.

“Thank god,” Lena breathes.

Sam and Alex just catch eyes, their gaze lingering for a long beat as Kara playfully slaps Lena on the wrist before Lena pulls her in for a kiss that halts Kara’s complaints.

“God, you know, it’s getting late,” Sam finally says, her eyes never leaving Alex, not even knowing what time it even is. “I better get home before the babysitter starts calling,” she finally says, turning to Kara and Lena.

When she looks back, Alex’s eyes are on her still.

“I’ll walk you out.”

-

They make small talk during the short elevator ride down to the first floor, about their weeks and work and teasing Kara and Lena about their inability to go even a moment without touching. Meanwhile, Sam uses all of her will power to keep her hands to herself, despite how good Alex looks. Her eyes keep glancing over, moving over Alex’s slender but muscular frame, taking in the way her leather jacket hugs her shoulders, her hands shoved in her pockets casually, her head tilted down, hair falling just slightly over her cheekbone.

When the elevator finally dings as they reach the first level, it jolts Sam to release a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding.

Outside, there is a brisk chill to the air, the only indicator of the change of seasons in National City. Sam leads the way towards her car, and Alex follows quietly in tow.

“Do you have plans this week?” Sam finally asks. “Before Thanksgiving?”

“Well, you know how we said my mom was coming into town?”

“Mmhmm.”

“She’s my house guest,” Alex explains with a grimace. “All week long.”

“Ah. Well, welcome to my life,” Sam says with a laugh.

“At least yours has her own room,” Alex replies with a smile.

“Fair point,” Sam admits, but it doesn’t change that her place isn’t a viable option for them on any average night to be together. And now, knowing it’s been over a week since they’ve been in bed together, knowing it will be even longer without Alex makes her tense and jittery like an addict going through withdrawal.

When they round the corner to a quieter street, where the street traffic has already faded for the night, the back of her hand grazing against Alex’s, Sam has already decided she can’t restrain herself any longer.

“Come here,” Sam says, turning to Alex.

She reaches for Alex’s hips and pulls her towards her, backing them both up until Sam is sandwiched tightly between Alex’s body and the side of the building.

Alex’s hands move without hesitation, one sliding around Sam’s waist, the other reaches down the curve of her hip and down to her thigh, lifting it up until Sam’s knee is bent, giving Alex more space between Sam’s legs.

Alex leans in, and Sam reaches up to Alex’s face, pulling their mouths together. Sam moans lightly at the contact that she’s been craving all week. The kiss is long and deep. Heat spreads through Sam’s body when she feels Alex’s tongue slide softly against hers.

Alex’s mouth moves down to Sam’s neck, and Sam slides her hands down Alex’s frame to her waist where she snakes her hands under Alex’s jacket and slides them under her shirt, letting her fingers trail over the soft smooth skin.

Eventually, Alex’s lips trail kisses back up Sam’s neck to her ear, where she lets her tongue roll over Sam’s earlobe, sending a rush through her.

“I think it really is getting late,” Alex whispers.

Sam groans as Alex pulls away slightly to bring them face to face.

“I’ll pay the sitter overtime,” Sam replies, one hand still fixed on Alex’s waist, holding her firmly in place against her, the other slides up Alex’s shirt, fingers sliding over the thin fabric covering her breast.

Alex arches into her touch.

“Someone is extra needy tonight,” Alex remarks playfully.

“I don’t know when I’m going to get to see you again,” Sam objects.

“You’re seeing me Thursday,” Alex says with a laugh.

“That’s not what I mean,” Sam says, leaning in and placing her lips back on Alex’s, pulling her bottom lip in between her own.

“Oh yeah?” Alex says with a smirk when she finally pulls back, leaving their mouths just inches away. “Tell me what you mean.”

“I mean see you naked,” Sam says, her hands reaffirming their grip.

Alex releases a deep laugh, her head falling back in amusement.

“I thought you’d be more subtle with that explanation.”

“When have I ever been subtle?” Sam replies with a sly smile.

“You got me there,” Alex says, leaning back, breaking contact, her hands reaching for Sam’s to pull her forward with her and finish the journey to Sam’s car a few paces away.

Alex’s hand is warm, and Sam lets their grasp linger, savoring the new feeling just for a moment before reminding herself that holding hands is for relationships.

At Sam’s car, she unlocks and pulls open the driver’s side door before turning back to say goodbye.

“So, I’ll see you Thursday?” Sam says remorsefully.

Alex leans in and places a soft chaste kiss on Sam’s lips that leaves her breathless.

“Thursday.”

—

It’s early afternoon when Sam and Ruby arrive at Kara’s place, Sam carrying a pan of sweet potatoes and Ruby with a pumpkin pie, despite both Danvers insistence that they only needed to bring themselves. They’re late, per usual, and when Kara swings the door wide open, greeting them with a huge smile, Sam can already see the space filled out with mostly familiar faces and a few new ones.

Ruby gives Kara a brief hug before she spots Alex and her eyes light up with excitement.

“Alex!” Ruby exclaims.

Sam watches Alex turn to the door and return Ruby’s smile.

“Little gem!” Alex exclaims back as Ruby runs to her.

They embrace, just as Alex catches eyes with Sam over Ruby’s shoulder and flashes her a warm smile.

“I’m sorry we’re late,” Sam tells Kara apologetically. “L- Corp emergency!”

Kara flashes a small frown, and Sam knows it’s because when she’d left the office, Lena was still there.

“I heard,” Kara laments.

Sam leans in and they exchange a hug.

“Don’t worry, she’ll be here,” Sam assures her.

Kara nods as they pull apart.

“Thanks. Can I get you a drink?” Kara offers.

She hesitates, looking back to Ruby and Alex, who are already seated together on the couch, feeling guilty for leaving Alex on sitter duties, but Alex waves her away with a smile.

Sam turns back to Kara. “I’d love one.”

—

A few minutes later, Sam leans over the kitchen island with a glass of wine, feeling grateful for Alex making sure Ruby is having a good time despite being the only kid there, even if the reprieve means she doesn’t get Alex’s company to herself. She smiles as she watches Alex interact with Ruby with ease. A natural, Sam thinks, and she wonders how she ever believed Alex didn’t want kids.

“So, you’re the woman who has been occupying my daughter’s time?” a voice says.

Sam looks up to see an older blonde woman beside her, noting the same slender nose and angled jaw Sam admires in Alex and instantly knowing who it is.

Her eyes widen in surprise at the question, her mouth dropping open slightly, trying to find words.

“I’m sorry?” Sam awkwardly stutters.

“I heard you talking about L-Corp,” the woman explains, before shaking her head in response to Sam’s expression. “You’re not Lena...”

“Oh, right,” Sam replies with a nervous relieved laugh. “No, not Lena.”

“Goodness, my mistake,” the woman responds, gesturing with her hand in apology. “Kara’s been keeping her new relationship so under wraps. I’m starting to think this woman doesn’t exist.”

Sam smiles. “Well, I work with Lena, and I can confirm both her existence and that she should be here soon. We were handling an emergency at the office. I’m Sam Arias, her CFO,” Sam explains, reaching out her hand to shake the woman’s.

“Oh right, the girls have mentioned you,” she replies. “Eliza Danvers,” the woman tells Sam, taking her hand and shaking.

“It’s a pleasure, Dr. Danvers. I’ve heard a lot about you too.”

“Oh please, just Eliza. We’re not in the lab,” Eliza insists, drawing a smile from Sam at seeing where Alex gets her modesty from. “They told me you’re a single mom.”

Sam nods as she motions with a head tilt to the opposite side of the room where Ruby sits with Alex.

“That I am.”

Sam hears Eliza release a deep sigh.

“It’s tough. You worry so much. It’s like all of that falling on one set of shoulders is exponentially heavier.”

“It is,” Sam agrees. “I’m guessing that doesn’t go away, huh?”

“I wish it did. I think it gets worse once they’re not under your roof.”

“And here I thought that’s when things finally got easier,” Sam replies with a light laugh.

Eliza smiles softly before her expression grows concerned. Sam follows Eliza’s gaze over to her own daughter seated on the couch.

“I’ve tried to be there for her, through all of this, but she won’t talk to me,” Eliza laments.

Sam nods, remembering the Alex from a few months ago. Sullen, broken, even bitter. Back then, her laughs were forced, her jokes were cut with derision. Though she hadn’t considered it before, Sam’s not surprised that Alex’s mother would worry. There had been a sadness emanating from her that was nearly palpable, one that would break any mother’s heart.

Her eyes lock on Alex with Ruby, and she feels a flood of warmth, knowing that now, Alex smiles without abandon, she laughs freely. Sam feels grateful not only that Alex has seemed to find the light, but that she’s been allowed to bear witness to her transformation. Not to mention being on the receiving end of that laughter, those smiles, has been her own gift.

And tonight, seeing Alex with Ruby only reinforces to Sam that Alex’s impossible choice had been the right one.

“I know it’s been hard on her, but she’s tough. What she did was really brave. I don’t think a lot of people could have made that decision. But she knew what she wanted, what was important to her. And I think time has been helping. She’s doing better with it,” Sam reassures Eliza.

“I hope so. My Alex, she’s always putting others first, but she deserves everything.”

Sam swallows hard, feeling her heart swell a little as she watches Alex gesturing emphatically as she tells Ruby a story, a wide grin on her daughter’s face.

“Yeah...” Sam whispers. “She does...”

A long beat passes as Sam’s gaze lingers.

“So, you and Alex are close?” Eliza finally asks, pulling Sam’s attention back.

“Oh, no. No. I mean, she’s a friend, but I really just know her through Kara,” Sam answers, shaking her head and waving her hand dismissively, before realizing how her insistence could betray her own lie.

Eliza nods, eyes narrowed slightly, and Sam wonders if she believes her. 

“Well, you seem to know her very well,” Eliza replies.

Sam feels her face flush.

Just then, Ruby rises from the couch shouting for Sam as Alex trails behind her, announcing energetically that Alex had promised her an introduction to Supergirl.

Sam just smiles and laughs, wondering how Alex had so easily found a way into her daughter’s heart.

And for a moment, before she can shutter the thought, she thinks to herself...

And her own...

—

Hours later, after too much food and even more liquor, the group sits around the long table taking turns reciting what they’re thankful for. Some confessions are silly, others more serious.

The turn finally reaches Alex who Sam watches as she sharply inhales, her body tensing, her fingers nervously twisting her wine glass.

“I am...so thankful for all of you,” she starts. “You have all been there for me...in some way or another,” Alex continues, her eyes moving around the table, for a moment locking with Sam as something unspoken passes between them, and Sam can’t help but feel like an eternity in that moment, before Alex finally breaks their gaze. “You all have helped me get through a very difficult year, one I really thought at times would swallow me whole. But each one of you have given me love, and kindness, shoulders to cry on, and open arms. And I couldn’t be more grateful.”

Sam’s eyes well up with tears, and she looks down to hide it, quickly wiping the corner of her eye with her finger, as Alex retakes her seat.

Sam can’t describe the unanticipated emotions running through her at Alex’s remarks, can’t put words to them, too complex to name, or maybe too complicated, except that they are overwhelming.

—

The evening winds down. Ruby grows sleepy, and they move her to Kara’s bed where she quickly falls asleep. Almost all of Kara’s friends and coworkers have filtered out, leaving Sam to finally have a few moments with Alex alone.

They’re on the couch, Sam’s legs pulled up under her as she sits facing Alex. Across the room, Kara, Lena, and Eliza sit at the dining table. While Sam hopes Lena isn’t getting grilled, she’s grateful to have Alex to herself for a bit, knowing their closeness, their familiarity has to be hidden anytime anyone else is around.

“Thank you for this,” Sam tells Alex. “This was really great for Ruby.”

Alex smiles. “She’s fun.”

“Yeah?” Sam asks with a doubtful questioning expression.

Alex releases a soft laugh. “Spirited.”

“I think that’s a better descriptor,” Sam replies with a firm nod.

“I like her,” Alex says with a kind of unquestioning certainty that hits Sam in the gut with its honesty, its tenderness, realizing she’s not ever know what it felt like for someone to hold this kind of affinity for her kid, the kind that didn’t come with ulterior motives or conditions for her affection.

“Well, it’s clearly mutual.”

Her eyes dart over to her daughter a few yards away fast asleep and smiles, grateful for the chance this year to be able to give her the kind of Thanksgiving every kid deserves, filled with warmth and love and laughter, grateful to Alex for allowing this.

“I hope this wasn’t only great for her though,” Alex says, breaking Sam’s thoughts.

“Well, it was no round in the sack,” Sam teases playfully, “but it was actually...”

“Tolerable?” Alex interjects, grimacing.

“I was actually going to say, better.”

“Good.” Alex smiles with relief. “I was wondering, what are you doing Saturday?”

“I don’t know,” Sam shrugs. “Movie night at home?”

“I heard my mother insisting on dinner with Kara and Lena. To get to know her better,” Alex explains suggestively.

Sam looks over Alex’s shoulder to see how Lena is surviving before looking back to Alex who she catches for just a brief moment with her gaze on Sam’s mouth and desire in her eyes.

“I see,” Sam replies with a knowing nod.

“Can you get a sitter?” Alex asks, her brows raised hopefully.

Sam’s eyes move over Alex’s face, over her soft brown eyes and angled jaw and high cheekbones and those lips that Sam already is lucky enough to know the skills of, and she is already wishing it was Saturday.

“I’ll call everyone in the book.”

—

It’s just after seven when Sam walks into the lobby of The Baldwin. The floors are marble and ornate chandeliers hang from the ceiling. It’s not her first time inside, but she’s never been upstairs. It was Alex’s idea, more her insistence. She didn’t want to worry about her mother walking in on them after she finished her dinner with Kara and Lena, and Sam couldn’t complain about not having to watch the clock and the door all evening.

Standing in the richly adorned lobby, she feels underdressed in her dark jeans and blouse. Knowing where she was headed, she had thought briefly at home while standing in front of the mirror if a dress was more appropriate. She’d decided otherwise. This isn’t a date, she had told herself over and over, even as her anticipation threatened to betray her.

Sam stops at the front desk and after giving them her name, she’s slid a key, and she makes her way to the elevator which takes her up to the 37th floor.

At the end of the long corridor, Sam raps her knuckles twice on the door before inserting her card and pushing the door open. She steps inside.

“Alex?” she calls out.

“Be right out,” the voice calls back from behind the bathroom door.

Sam takes in the room, the pristine white bedding, the gold accented furniture, the crystal chandelier, and the view. God, the view, Sam thinks, as her eyes take in the shining lights of the National City skyscrapers through the floor to ceiling, wall to wall window. Sam crosses to the center of the room where a silver room service tray sits on a table, a bottle of Pinot noir set atop with two wine glasses waiting, one untouched, one half drunk. She reaches for one and takes a sip before moving closer to the window to take in the view.

Behind her, Sam hears the bathroom door open

“Hey,” she hears Alex say.

Sam turns toward Alex and feels the air escaping her lungs, leaving her breathless at the sight of her. Her mouth drops open slightly.

“You cut your hair,” Sam murmurs, her eyes frozen on Alex, taking her in, as she unconsciously bites her lower lip.

The sides of Alex’s hair are cropped short, shaved, leaving a longer section on top that falls in front of her face. Sam had always found Alex attractive, but this was another level entirely.

“Yeah, sort of a whim yesterday,” Alex replies casually, one hand instinctively moving to her head, pushing back the longer strands and giving Sam a better view of the short sides.

Sam swallows hard. “It suits you.”

Alex moves towards her slowly. She reaches for the other wine glass and lifts it to her lips.

“How many sitters did you have to call?” Alex asks, as she takes down the last swig from her glass and pours another for herself.

“Almost a dozen,” Sam says, rolling her eyes in frustration at the endeavor it took to make tonight happen.

Alex laughs and nods.

“No one wants to work a holiday weekend.”

“Paying double for tonight.”

Alex takes another sip and sets down her glass, moving closer to Sam.

“It’ll be worth it,” Alex tells her confidently, a knowing smirk on her face, as she takes the near empty glass from Sam’s hand and sets it on a nearby table.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” Alex whispers, reaching her left arm around Sam’s waist and swiftly pulling her body tight against her own.

It’s then that Sam feels it, the firmness between Alex’s legs, and Sam feels heat spread through her as the strap on presses into her inner thigh.

“Fuck, Alex,” Sam moans, her head tilting back slightly, feeling herself already growing wet at just the thought of what Alex is planning to do to her tonight.

Alex leans in, her mouth finding the curve of Sam’s neck, her lips running up the length, tongue sliding along the surface. Sam grips Alex by her shirt tightly, feeling her legs growing unsteady as her body is overwhelmed with desire. She feels Alex’s other hand reach for her hip, her strong arms firmly holding Sam in place. Alex’s mouth finally finds Sam’s, and the kiss is urgent and needy and desperate.

Alex’s hands slide under Sam’s shirt momentarily before reaching for the hem and breaking the kiss to pull it over Sam’s head. Alex’s hands return to Sam, one snaking behind her back and unclasping her bra before sliding it off Sam’s shoulders.

Sam reaches up and begins unbuttoning Alex’s shirt, needing to feel her skin against her own. Once the buttons are undone, Alex shrugs off the shirt and pulls her athletic bra over her head before pulling Sam close again, bodies pressed tightly. Alex kisses her again, tongue sliding against Sam’s bottom lip before moving down her neck again to her chest. One hand slides over one of Sam’s breasts as her tongue slides over the other. Sam’s breathes are uneven and her heart is racing.

Just then, Alex drops to her knees. She carefully, deliberately undoes Sam’s jeans and slides them down her legs. Sam steps out of them, and Alex tosses them aside. Her hands move up Sam’s legs, and when Alex’s mouth finds her inner thigh, Sam finds herself quivering.

Sam’s breathing quickens as Alex’s fingers hook around her underwear and slides them down.

“Oh god,” Sam stutters out as Alex lifts one of Sam’s legs and dips her head between her legs, her tongue sliding against Sam’s core.

Her hands find Alex’s hair, her fingers tangling in her cropped locks, as Alex’s mouth moves diligently against the slickness between her legs, the energy building in Sam at every motion.

Just as she starts getting close, Alex pulls away and stands to her feet. She’s face to face with Sam, their eyes locked intensely, and Sam can practically feel herself falling apart, helpless in Alex’s touch, realizing she’s never known this kind of need, this hunger for another.

Before Sam can deconstruct her feelings, Alex swiftly flips Sam around so that her back is to Alex. Her eyes take in the view, the feeling of being naked in front of the window only fueling her arousal.

She can hear Alex unfasten her belt, unzip her jeans, and slide them down. Sam can feel her core pulsing with anticipation. The next thing she feels is Alex sliding the strap on against her, coating it with Sam’s wetness, before she slides it deep within her.

“Oh fuck,” Sam gasps, as Alex begins slowly sliding in and out of her.

Alex gradually starts to increase her pace.

Sam’s palms spread out flat on the glass, using the window to leverage against Alex’s thrusts, wanting more.

“God, yes,” Sam mutters, as Alex grips her hips even tighter and moves harder and faster inside her, each thrust bringing Sam closer to the edge.

Alex reaches with one hand and wraps her fingers around Sam’s hair, tilting her hair back with just enough force to send her over the edge, body quivering, breaths erratic, screaming Alex’s name.

—

Two hours later, they lie in bed facing each other, naked, the crisp white sheets draped over their lower bodies. The lights are dim. The bottle of wine sits empty. Behind Sam are the vast windows revealing the backdrop of the gleaming city.

Sam’s body is still buzzing. She can still feel Alex on her fingers, taste her on her lips. Alex has her arm bent at the elbow, her head propped up with her hand, her hair is pushed back, making the shaved sides easily visible. Sam’s eyes move over Alex’s, over the strong angle of her jaw, the smooth curve of her neck, the sharp line of her clavicle, with admiration. If she still had the energy to move, her hands would be back on Alex right now, but she can barely move, and besides, there is something calming about lying beside her in observance, like she’s at a museum appreciating a well sculpted work of art.

Sam never understood addiction, but this is what it must feel like, she thinks. This never feeling full, never being sated, always wanting more. It’s terrifying and thrilling, this loss of control, but right now, in the throws of exultation, she refuses to consider the implications.

“So, what prompted it?” Sam asks, her head tilting, motioning to Alex’s hair.

“I guess I’ve been feeling more myself lately,” Alex explains. “Like I know who that is now, not just... defined by someone else.”

And Sam can’t help but agree. Even before her new cut, Alex has seemed more comfortable in her skin, confident, assured, and it has only made her more attractive.

She nods in reply. “I’m glad,” she whispers.

Her eyes are caught with Alex’s for a long beat, before Sam breaks it by leaning back onto the pillow, eyes on the ceiling where the chandelier dangles. Her palms slide across the high thread count sheets.

“I could get used to this,” Sam remarks with a smirk.

“Oh god, please don’t,” Alex pleads humorously, eyes wide, with a hearty laugh. “Government salary.”

“Alex! Shit, I wasn’t thinking. You have to let me pay,” Sam protests as she sits up again to face Alex.

Alex shakes her head. “Definitely not. I wanted to do this. Besides, I’m a sucker for a nice view,” she adds, motioning with her head towards the window.

“I don’t know, I think I’m the one with the nice view,” Sam replies with a smirk as her eyes run over Alex’s body suggestively before meeting her gaze.

Sam purses her lips as their eyes lock intensely. Then, feeling a surge of energy and need, Sam pulls herself closer to Alex, pushing her back until her head hits the pillow and crawls onto Alex’s lap, straddling her hips. She lifts her hand to brush the hair away from Alex’s face.

“You’re so beautiful, Alex,” Sam breathes before she can hold herself back, before she can think of the ramifications of this honesty, wonder if she’s gone too far beyond just appreciating the benefits of this arrangement, that she’s started to need this...need Alex.

Alex reaches her hands around Sam’s back and pulls her closer until their lips meet, and Sam pushes away all of her reservations, all fear of repercussions and just lets herself savor the way it feels to be in Alex’s arms.


	5. Chapter 5

Days later, Sam is still replaying that night at the Baldwin with Alex, every touch, every sensation, every kiss.

Even this morning, when she wakes up with a fever and cough and a runny nose and her muscles aching like she was hit by a bus, it’s still on her mind. Sam sighs as she pulls herself from bed to her alarm and curses this thing that was just a scratch in her throat when she fell asleep the night before.

After getting a begrudging Ruby off to school on the bus, calling her assistant to cancel her day, and texting Lena to apologize, she crawls back into bed. 

A few hours later, she wakes to her cell buzzing beside her. She glances down and picks it up quickly. 

“Alex, hey,” she says, her voice course and nasally. 

“Do you want to meet for lunch?” Alex asks, with an energy that fills Sam with regret for the answer she has to give. 

“I can’t. I’m home in bed,” she replies regretfully. 

“Convenient, that’s exactly where I want you,” Alex answers in a tone that immediately brings Sam back to that hotel room. 

“No, I think I have the flu,” she clarifies, her voice heavy with disappointment. 

“Ohhh,” Alex chuckles at her own mistake. “Well, good thing I know where to get the best chicken noodle soup in town.”

“Oh Alex, you don’t need to-

“I’ll be right over.”

Same hears a click and she looks down at her phone to see Alex has already hung up. 

Sam looks down at her ratty pajamas, knowing her makeup isn’t done and her hair is unkempt. 

“Shit,” she mutters, as she rises to her feet, grabs a robe from her closet and races to the bathroom. 

—

By the time the doorbell rings not much later, Sam has managed to throw herself together, smoothing her hair back into a low messy bun and applying a touch of makeup, trying to conceal her dark circles, but she’s still wearing her thick cotton robe she threw on to cover her pajamas. 

Sam reaches the front door and takes one last look at herself. Just then, she realizes she still has on a pair of Ruby’s socks, Supergirl emblems and all covering her feet. She quickly reaches down and pulls them off, throwing them out of view. 

Finally, she reaches for the door knob and swings it open. 

“Hi,” Sam breathes. 

Alex has a broad smile on her face. She’s in jeans, a black leather jacket, dark boots that make her a touch taller than Sam in her bare feet. She runs her eyes over Alex and feels her breath catch. 

She still hasn’t gotten used to Alex’s new look, not just how good she looks with her shorter cut, but also how she carries herself these days. That confidence, that swagger. Alex probably doesn’t even realize how she can disarm Sam with the smallest smirk, like the one she has on right now. 

Because Alex has always been breathtaking, but this...

Sam feels her face get hot. 

“One for you and one for Ruby, when she inevitably catches it,” Alex explains, holding up a bowl of neatly packaged soup in each hand. 

Sam smiles and takes them from Alex’s hands. 

“What about you, walking into this germ soirée?” Sam asks as she turns to head to the kitchen, Alex following behind. 

“Oh, I don’t get sick,” Alex remarks casually in a way that makes Sam chuckle and shake her head. 

When she reaches the kitchen, Sam sets the soup on the table and starts unwrapping one. 

“When do you have to be back?” she asks as she pulls out the container from the bag and peels off the lid.

Alec shrugs. “It’s flexible.” 

“Slow day at the office? No one to protect and serve?” Sam teases. 

“Just you,” Alex replies with another smirk that makes Sam’s heart beat quicken. 

Sam suddenly is aware of how close they are standing, realizing this is already the longest they’ve been alone together without touching. 

Sam finally looks away from Alex’s piercing gaze and moves away to grab a spoon from a nearby drawer, lingering there until her heart steadies. 

“Not as exciting as risking your life,” Sam remarks.

“I mean, some would argue I should have worn a hazmat suit over here,” Alex quips, and Sam laughs, shaking her head. 

“Come on,” Sam says as she grabs her soup in one hand and Alex’s belt loop with the other, tugging her towards the couch.

Sam takes a seat on one end and watches as Alex shrugs off her leather jacket and hangs it over the back of an arm chair before settling about a foot away from her. Sam inhales sharply, taking in Alex’s long neck, her bare shoulders underneath her sleeveless top, the way the longer end of her hair falls over her face when she moves. 

“So, how’s your mom? How was the rest of her visit?” Sam asks, diverting her gaze as she takes a sip of soup, thinking to herself that Alex was right with her claim about it being the best.

“Good, it was nice. We haven’t really had much time together since... you know, the breakup,” Alex explains. 

“Oh, right,” Sam replies with a soft nod, realizing that in the last few months, she had damn near forgotten about Maggie’s existence. It didn’t seem to be on Alex’s mind anymore, but maybe that was her own misguided, biased view. “Maggie,” Sam adds softly, the name twisting an ache in her stomach.

“Actually, she was happy to see how well I was doing. At least that’s what she said. She always tried to reassure me that I’d made the right decision, but I think seeing that I finally feel the same way made her a little less worried.”

Sam smiles softly, feeling a sense of relief she didn’t anticipate. 

“That’s great, Alex.”

“She asked after you a lot actually,” Alex adds, her words careful and deliberate, as if she’s unsure whether she should even be saying them. 

Sam looks back surprised. 

“Really? We only talked a couple of minutes at Thanksgiving.”

“I think she must have taken to you. She asked a lot of questions. Things I didn’t even know the answer to.”

“Like?”

Alex shrugs. “Where you’re from. How old you are. How long you’ve been in National City. Who Ruby’s father is,” she says more carefully, averting her eyes. “Your middle name,” Alex adds with a shrug that Sam is sure she means to look casual.

Sam laughs. “Come on, she did not ask my middle name.”

Alex looks back up with the corner of her mouth turned up. “No, she didn’t. That one’s mine.”

“Ok, I grew up on a little farm outside Oak Park. I’m 29, 30 in May. Gemini, if she’s curious,” Sam adds with a smirk. “Ruby and I have been back here for two years after a stint in Star City and then Metropolis. And my middle name is Lucia after my mom’s late husband Luciano, who died before she adopted me. Yours?”

“Renee. After my mom’s best friend growing up. So you just gonna gloss over that other one?”

“Yep,” Sam says with a self-satisfied nod before relenting. “Look, I say Ruby doesn’t have a father because she really doesn’t. He and his parents wanted me to ‘take care of it.’ He’s never met her and never will. Does that explain things enough? For your mom, of course.” 

“I’ll relay your answers,” Alex says with a knowing smirk.

—

Later, after Sam has flipped on some subtitled telenovela she’s been hearing about, after they’ve settled in, after Sam has realized after a few dismissed calls that Alex is in no rush to return to the bureau, Sam thinks how easy this feels. She and Alex beside each other on the couch, relaxed, comfortable, laughing.

It’s nice. Maybe more than nice, but Sam’s not about to put another label on it. 

They’re friends at most. Good ones, that take advantage of the warmth of each other’s beds, that look out for each other, that confide in each other. But friends. 

Sam realizes she’s been looking at Alex for a little too long and is about to turn her gaze back to the television, when she sees Alex’s body stiffen. Sam glances back at the television where two woman are pulling each other closer, hands on hips, lips finally connecting, setting off a cascade of heated kisses. 

Sam looks back at Alex and can almost read the arousal on her face as her eyes take in the figures on the screen. Sam swallows hard, watching Alex purse her lips and shift her weight, like she’s trying so hard to cool the heat rising up in her body. 

Sam thinks to herself that if this were a movie, this would play out differently. In the movie version of this scene, Sam would just have the sniffles, she’d have lipstick on, her legs would be shaved. It wouldn’t be the snotty runny nose mixed with her dark under eye circles and unwashed hair that is the reality. 

In this movie version, Alex’s hand would slide over her ankle, scoot up her calf, part her robe. The silk (not durable practical cotton that she has on now) would fall open, and she’d be naked underneath. Alex would reach for her thighs and pull her closer until her back hits the couch cushion just as Alex’s head dips between her legs and Sam’s head falls back in ecstasy. 

But sadly, this is not a movie, Sam thinks as she grabs another tissue to wipe her nose.

Just then, the hum of her cell ringing takes over the sound of the television characters. 

She watches Alex almost blink out of a daze and look over at her. 

“How’s your throat? Can I make you some tea?” Alex asks, launching into the second question before Sam can even answer the first, as she starts to stand from the couch. 

Sam frowns as she reaches for her phone. 

“I don’t think we have any,” she replies as she watches Alex head towards the kitchen anyway. 

Sam looks down to check the caller ID before answering. 

“Lena, hey, I’m so sorry again for not making it in today,” Sam tells her apologetically. 

“Oh stop. How are you feeling?” Lena asks. 

“Hanging in there, I guess,” she says, her eyes flashing over to Alex for a moment, smiling softly as she sees her grab a mug from a cabinet, thinking to herself how she never realized quite how good it would feel to have someone take care of you, that she’d been missing that for so so long. 

“You sound awful,” Lena tells her bluntly. 

“Thanks,” Sam says sarcastically with a laugh, shaking her head.

“Do you need anything? Should I stop by? Make sure you’re not dying?”

“No!” Sam replies too quickly and too loudly, drawing Alex’s gaze from the kitchen. “I mean, no, I’m fine,” she adds more softly. “Really.”

“Why are you whispering? Is someone there?”

“What? No, god, no. Why would you think that?”

“You know I live at the Baldwin, Sam,” Lena answers knowingly, and all of a sudden, realization sets in. That night. Lena, she saw her. “I thought you’d tell me if you were seeing someone,” Lena continues. 

“I’m not. I am so not, Lena,” Sam stutters out, squeezing her eyes shut, hoping Lena buys it, but knowing full well even she wouldn’t buy that response. 

“Hm, well, then now I’m curious,” Lena says, her interest clearly piqued. “Who is she? Where’d you find this woman? She must be something else to lay down that kind of cash.”

Sam’s brows furrow. “What?”

“You paid for it, right?”

“Paid for it? I don’t pick up hookers, Lena!” 

Sam hears Lena release a guttural laugh.

“I mean the hotel room.”

“Oh. As a matter of fact, I did not,” she tells her, almost proudly. 

“Wow, did Samantha Arias find herself a sugar mama?” 

“Oh my god, Lena. Come on.” 

“So does this unsuspecting woman know that after hemorrhaging cash to get you in bed, she’ll never see you again?”

“Ok, Lena, thanks for checking in. I’m hanging up now,” Sam says, shaking her head again and pulling the phone from her ear, before she hits the red button and slides it into her pocket.

She makes her way over to the kitchen closer to Alex, who is stirring ingredients together in a cup. 

“Sorry, Lena,” she tells Alex apologetically. 

Alex smiles warmly. “They holding down the fort without you?”

“Yeah, she just wanted to see how I was feeling.”

“She seems like a good friend.”

Sam nods. “I owe a lot to her. She saw something in me way back when, gave me an opportunity. She’s always been understanding of trying to juggle work and being a mother. 

Alex frowns. “That’s something I haven’t really worked out the logistics of yet.”

“You will. It just sort of happens without you even meaning for it to. And you’re a natural. The way you are with Ruby, I can tell,” she explains, thinking about Thanksgiving, about how she had watched Alex with Ruby out of the corner of her eye, seen them interact, laugh. Seen how Alex had taken care to give Ruby her full attention, how she’d so easily connected with her. How amazed Sam had been at the sight of it. 

“Tell what?” Alex asks with curiosity.

“You’re going to be an incredible mother.”

Sam sees Alex’s face flush just slightly and her head dip. Alex looks up a moment later and lifts the mug to hand to Sam.

“Here. This should help,” Alex offers.

“Thank you,” Sam says, taking the mug from Alex’s hands. Sam takes a sip, letting the warm liquid fill her throat, tasting a mix of lemon and herbs and a touch of whiskey she must have had in the back of her cabinet. “Mmm, this is good. Thank you.”

Sam looks up at Alex to catch a smirk on her face.

“So no hookers, huh?” Alex jests. “That’s good to know.”

Sam laughs, moving a touch closer to Alex. 

“I should be asking you, going all Richard Gere on me last week,” she teases. 

“Touché,” Alex says, smirking, her hand moving up to Sam’s hip, letting just the tips of her fingers press into her. 

Sam smiles. “Let’s see, how does it go again,” she says, pulling the old movie quote from her mind. “‘I appreciate this whole seduction thing you've got going on, but let me give you a tip.” She leans in seductively, close enough that she is just a breath from Alex’s ear. Her voice drops an octave. “‘I'm a sure thing.’”

She sees Alex’s eyes flash with desire, feels the grip of her hand tighten on her hip, the touch sending a electricity through Sam’s body.

Just then, Sam feels an itch in her nose and turns her head swiftly, covering her mouth to sneeze. 

She looks back up at Alex guiltily. 

Alex smiles sincerely and moves her hand from Sam’s hip to intertwine their fingers.

“Come on. You should be resting,” Alex tells her, pulling her back towards the couch. 

Alex takes a seat at one end, resting her elbow on the arm of the sofa. Sam sits down next to her, close but not too close, and she wonders why she’s even thinking twice about their proximity. 

Sam feels her fatigue setting in again and releases a long yawn. 

“Come here,” she hears Alex say and looks up to see her motioning for her to come closer. 

Sam slides a few inches across the couch and lets her head gently settle into the crook of Alex’s shoulder, letting her weight sink in to her as Alex’s arm wraps around her shoulders. Her body relaxes, her eyes close as she savors the feeling. 

She can smell the faint scent of Alex’s skin, feel the pad of Alex’s thumb slowly running over the curve of her elbow, hear the soft rhythm of Alex’s breathing, and she wonders if this is what people mean when they say that a person feels like home...

—

A few days later, Kara lets the cat out of the bag. She knows Alex was trying to hide it since they’d been texting almost daily, and Alex hadn’t mentioned it. But Kara, sweet unknowing Kara, doesn’t know any better.

So it’s when Kara stops by the office to see Lena one day that Sam hears from her that Alex is sick.

And so, the first break in her day, Sam is rushing out the door. She shows up minutes later at Alex’s door carrying a jug of orange juice and lozenges and canned soup because all she had time for was a stop at the gas station. 

When Alex pulls the door open, she’s in joggers and a sweatshirt and her hair is a tousled mess of russet locks she’s pushing out of her eyes when Sam sees the surprised recognition cross her face. 

“Hey, what are you doing here?” Alex says, her eyes wide, her voice husky. 

Sam smirks. “What are you? I thought you don’t get sick.”

Alex smiles and laughs, before it quickly turns into a coughing fit, and Sam immediately feels guilty for being the cause. 

“Do you want to come in?” Alex asks. 

But she can’t stay. There are board meetings and conference calls that she is swearing the very existence of, but she can’t do anything about them now. 

Sam hands her the goods, apologizing for the gas station quality remedies, which Alex takes with gratitude nonetheless and sets on a table beside the door. 

Alex thanks her softly, and Sam gives another flustered apology for having to leave just as Alex pulls her close, wrapping her arms around her. Sam lets herself relax into Alex’s arms, her eyes closing for a moment as she rests her head on Alex’s shoulder. Her hands run over Alex’s back, and god, does she want to stay. 

“I don’t want to make you late getting back,” Alex whispers, and Sam just nods regretfully before finally pulling away. 

Just before she goes, she leans in, placing a soft kiss on Alex’s cheek, and whispers, “Feel better.”

—

That night, after Ruby is asleep, Sam sits down on the sofa with a glass of wine and picks up the phone to call Alex. It rings and rings and rings until finally she hears it pick up. 

“Hello? This is Alex,” the voice answers, and Sam furrows her brow at the lack of familiarity in her voice.

“Hey, it’s me,” Sam replies with a confused laugh.

“Oh, hi, Sam,” Alex says, as if surprised to hear from her, as if Sam’s never called her before, as if they’re just acquaintances. “What’s up?”

And then she realizes. Someone is there. This awful feeling lurches in her stomach at the thought and then she feels even worse for feeling this way at all. Because Alex has every right. Every right to meet other women, go on dates, invite them back home, let them check on her when she isn’t well. Sam doesn’t own her. 

But she can’t deny that it hurts. 

“I just wanted to check on you,” Sam mutters, feeling embarrassed and stupid and naive. 

“I think I’m on the mend. Thank you for calling,” Alex replies awkwardly. 

“Yeah,” Sam says softly.

Alex says a prompt goodbye and hangs up quickly. Sam lingers, the phone still held to her ear when the call ends. 

An hour later, when Sam is crawling into bed, her phone rings. She sees Alex’s name and considers just silencing it and turning off her light to sleep, but she just can’t muster the resolve. 

“I’m sorry about earlier,” Alex blurts out without so much as a hello. 

“No, I didn’t mean to interrupt anything,” Sam says, shaking her head. 

“No, no. You weren’t. I mean, yes, but just Kara,” Alex explains apologetically. 

Sam crinkles her nose, feeling even more embarrassed for even getting worked up. 

“Right. Kara.”

“I’m sorry. I just froze up,” Alex explains. “We hadn’t talked about telling anyone. About us. I mean, not us. I know there’s no us, just, you know. About this.”

Sam nods. This. Whatever this is, this thing that she still can’t name, won’t name. 

“No apologies needed. So are you really on the mend?”

—

When Sam finally hangs up later, it’s past midnight and she knows the alarm clock in the morning is going to hurt, but she still doesn’t want to hang up the phone, doesn’t want to say good night, doesn’t want to let go of Alex’s voice. 

—

It’s not until week later when they finally see each other again, when Alex is back to full speed and Sam’s late quarter influx of meetings and calls dies down. It’s December now, the temperature has taken an abrupt drop, and Sam’s in her winter coat and scarf as she steps off of the elevator onto Alex’s floor. 

She can’t even count the number of times she’s been over now throughout the last few months. Alex’s place has become familiar now. Comfortable. Hitting the button to her floor has become automatic. She knows where the dishes in Alex’s kitchen go. Knows where Alex keeps her stash of good whiskey. She has a side of the bed. 

Sam tells herself over and over that it doesn’t mean anything, that this thing is just a convenient, equally advantageous, mutually beneficial arrangement, that she doesn’t want to tamper with. Why give up something that’s working so well? They’d hit no road blocks. No hurdles. Besides, no one is getting hurt, she thinks.

Sam taps at the door and with Alex expecting her, it opens quickly. Alex appears and there are quick murmured hellos. 

The moment Sam steps through the doorway, she feels Alex’s hands on her, pushing her wool coat off her shoulders until it hits the ground, pulling her tucked in shirt out from her pants, fingers unfastening buttons, a little rough, a little desperate, and it feels so good to be wanted this badly. To be needed. 

For a second, Sam wonders how she ever lived without this. She ponders how she ever will again, once Alex’s body is someone else’s. The thought feels like a dagger in Sam’s chest, and she pushes the thought away, savoring the here and now where it’s only them and Sam can pretend that Alex is only hers. 

Alex divulges Sam of her clothes quickly, shirt dropped by the door, black dress pants somewhere near the sofa, bra and panties in a small pile on the steps up to Alex’s bed. Alex’s hands roam over her body, her mouth moves to Sam’s neck where her lips and tongue dance, sending shock waves through Sam’s core. 

“God I’ve missed you,” Sam breathes, and her body stiffens just after the words are released from her lips, surprised by her own admission, anxious of what Alex will think of it, terrified of what it means to say it.

Alex freezes and pulls away slightly, and Sam feels her heart sink, thinking ‘what have I done’ on repeat, when she feels Alex’s hand on her face, softly cupping her cheek. Their eyes meet and Alex’s eyes are filled with so much tenderness, it aches.

“Me too,” Alex whispers, just as she leans in, Sam closing her eyes as Alex’s lips meet hers. 

They move towards the bed. Sam sits, Alex still standing above her. Sam watches her pull off her sweater while Sam reaches for the buckle of her jeans. Once it releases, she pushes Alex’s pants and underwear over her hips to the floor, letting her palms drag over her skin on their way. 

Alex pushes Sam back onto the bed, reaching an arm around Sam’s back and pulling them together towards the pillow. Alex settles her hips between Sam’s legs, pressing against Sam’s core just enough that Sam releases a gentle moan. Alex’s left arm stays wrapped around Sam’s waist while her right hand runs over Sam’s body. She slides over one breast, pulling it into her mouth, Sam arching her back into the touch. As her hand slides further down, Alex takes Sam’s mouth again, her tongue sliding against Sam’s before tugging Sam’s bottom lip between her teeth. Sam reaches her fingers to Alex’s hair, one hand tangling in the longer locks, one palm sliding against the closely shaved edge. Finally, Alex’s hand reaches Sam’s thigh, pushing her bent leg higher into the air. Sam feels her body aching for more as Alex moves against her, each thrust of her hips against her core sending electricity through her.

All of a sudden, Alex pulls away and Sam shivers as a rush of cold air hits her skin. 

“One sec,” Alex whispers, no doubt in response to the confusion on Sam’s face. 

Sam watches Alex move to one side of the bed and stand to her feet, pulling open the drawer to the nightstand. Alex reaches for an item, and immediately Sam feels herself grow wet, so much so it’s practically running down her thigh. Sam watches Alex step into the strap-on and slide it up her body into place. Sam’s mouth falls open in awe, and her brow raises at the sight because she’s sure she’s never seen anything so goddamn sexy in her entire life. 

Sam crawls across the bed until she’s kneeling in front of Alex. She lifts her hands to Alex’s body, running her hands over her muscled abs before leaning in, letting her tongue drag across Alex’s skin. She looks up to see Alex’s head fall back, and it only emboldens her. Her mouth runs up Alex’s body, her hands covering Alex’s breasts, thumbs sliding over her nipples until they’re hard. When she reaches Alex’s neck, she slides her hands around her and pulls Alex forward on top of her, both of them crashing onto the bed, Sam squealing and Alex laughing exuberantly. 

Sam pushes Alex onto her back and crawls on top of her, seeing Alex’s eyes darken with that familiar look of pure hunger. Sam straddles Alex’s hips letting her wetness coat Alex’s lower stomach. Slowly, she reaches her hand between them and pulls the strap on towards her until she slides it inside of her easily. She spreads her palms on Alex’s stomach as she starts grinding her hips slowly against Alex, her gaze fixed on Alex’s expression, on her hitched breathing, on the way her eyes take in Sam with such reverence. Alex’s hands find Sam’s thighs, running up to her hips, pulling Sam’s body down onto her with each rhythmic movement. Sam watches Alex as her arousal grows, watching her eyes move from Sam’s mouth to her breasts to the strap on sliding in and out of her thin frame. 

Sam reaches her right hand behind her own back, finding the heat between Alex’s legs and sliding her fingertips against her slick folds, hearing Alex moan in pleasure. Sam then pushes her fingers inside of Alex, savoring how warm and wet she is, how tight she feels around Sam’s fingers.

“Fuck,” Alex mutters, as Sam starts sliding in and out of Alex’s center, trying with each movement to get deeper, to feel closer to her. Sam can feel Alex’s body getting closer, but just before she comes, Alex pushes herself up and flips Sam smoothly onto her back.

Alex positions herself above Sam, and Sam’s entire body pulses with anticipation, her center aching for Alex to take her. Alex deftly positions the strap on over Sam’s wet center and slides it deep inside of her, releasing a whimper from Sam’s lips.

Alex’s gaze is on Sam as she starts sliding in and out, her thrusts slowly increasing in speed. 

Sam’s eyes are fixed on Alex’s body, on the contractions of her muscular abs and the sweat beading on her skin and her shoulders flexing. Alex’s pace quickens until it’s hard and it’s rough, and it’s just what Sam needs. She’s grunting and moaning with every thrust as Alex plunges firmly inside her, and she doesn’t even know how, but Sam wants even more of her. She spreads her legs wider, arches her back to allow Alex to press deeper, bringing Sam closer and closer to the edge of ecstasy. 

Alex lowers herself down until their bodies are closer, until her mouth is hovering just over Sam’s, until Sam’s hands can reach around her to grip Alex’s firm ass as her Alex pushes deeper and harder and faster, each motion matched by Sam’s hips arching towards her, until Sam finally feels her body surrender, crashing over the edge. She comes, erratic breaths, body shaking, muscles clenching, vision blurring, calling out Alex’s name over and over and over. 

—

Sam rushes back, entering her office flustered and frantic, smoothing her hair and trying to shake the lingering arousal from lunch with Alex. She’s finally setting down her bag and clicking a key on her computer to wake it up when she hears a voice startle her.

“Where have you been?”

Sam looks up quickly to see the figure seated on the white sofa in her office. 

“Lena!” Sam exclaims. “I, um, I had a lunch meeting,” she mutters nervously. 

“I didn’t see it on your schedule,” Lena replies coolly. 

“Hm, Jessica must be slacking.” Sam forces a laugh. 

“Oh, I can talk to her about that,” Lena offers, finally standing and crossing to Sam’s desk. 

“No! I mean, don’t worry about it,” Sam answers, shaking her head. 

“Uh huh,” Lena says with a suspicious nod.

Sam watches Lena linger a couple steps away from her, waiting expectantly for the reason for her visit.

“Your shirt’s buttoned wrong.” 

“What?” Sam replies immediately.

Lena points a finger at Sam and smirks.

Sam’s eyes widen as she looks down and notices that her shirt is buttoned one off all the way up. 

“Shit,” she mutters, as she frantically reaches down to fix it. 

Lena turns towards the door and takes a few steps, looking back before she exits.

“You’ll have to get me the name of that restaurant. Must have been delicious,” she adds suggestively before she takes one last step and disappears.

Sam just closes her eyes and grimaces, knowing Lena is never going to let up until she gives her a name.


End file.
